Eric Roberts, 60, and Mickey Rourke, 64
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-4077938/Mickey-Rourke-Eric-Roberts-attend-screening-Ronda-Rousey-documentary-Hollywood.html
It’s always great to see my contemporaries still kicking ass and taking names.
While Mickey is often maligned for his sense of style, I still see a lot of balls in his immutable swagger.
In the end, he’s having fun, and at this point, that’s all that matters.
As every older athlete knows, non-athletes are masters of projection.
Whatever they’d like to be doing – but can’t – they pretend is some sort of psychiatric disability in others.
With this in mind, here are 10 of the most often heard comments from older, non-athletic gym members.
I will dissect each of them in turn…
#1] Don’t overdo it!
Translation: I hope you sprain your knee doing all that stuff I wish i could do – or felt inclined, inspired or otherwise not too lazy to do – so I’d fell better about not doing it.
#2] You’re going to hurt your back doing all that weight!
Translation: I hurt my back working in the garden, so I’ll be damned if you get to lift 400 pounds without at least a strained tendon.
#3] You’re not 20 anymore!
Translation: I’m not 20 anymore and man do I feel it. So hell no! You’re not going to feel one bit younger then me!
#4] Are you trying to win a bodybuilding contest?
Translation: I resemble a human leviathan, so no, you don’t get to make me look and feel irrelevant!
#5] Doesn’t all that weight bother your joints?
Translation: I can’t get out of bed without bottle of Advil, so how can you possibly lift that much weight without swallowing two?
#6] Are you taking steroids?
Translation: Because I look like crap, he should look like crap. And if he doesn’t, it’s because he’s taking steroids, which doesn’t count.
#7] You’re my hero! [Back-handed compliment].
Translation: This is back-handed compliment that is both self-deprecating and dismissive. Sure, I’d like to look like that, but what ‘lunatic’ puts in that much effort without some psychiatric disability?
#8] Where do you get the energy to workout like that?
Translation: I have no energy to speak of, so why [or how] does he? This is also a way of putting me in my place through subtle innuendo that he knows I am, in fact, no longer 20.
#9] I know a man who ended up in the morgue doing that.
Translation: I’m afraid to anything physical anymore as I fear death more than I fear doing the things that I love. So basically, I’m already dead.
#10] Are you trying to live forever?
Translation: What difference does it make whether or not I work out? We’re all going to die. Of course, living better always trumps living longer, so there’s that.
~~~
FINAL THOUGHTS/SUGGESTIONS
There is no question that we Baby Boomers can no longer train the way we did at 20.
But this does not mean we can’t kick the average 20-year-old to the curb in the gym.
In order to do this, we must train smart.
If you can afford it, hire a qualified personal trainer with a degree in Kinesiology.
That’s what I did and it’s why I’m where I am today.
Your trainer can also offer tips on nutrition, and help keep you motivated.
The most common reason I hear from older men as to why they don’t hire a personal trainer is that they don’t want to commit to a certain time to train everyday.
Translation: I don’t really want to put myself through all this crap. Who am I kidding?
Researchers at University College London found a direct link between major health problems like heart disease, strokes and diabetes, and the amount of exercise done.
Those who regularly undertook moderate or vigorous physical activity at least once a week were much more likely to be “healthy agers” than those who remained inactive.
People who became physically active during the eight-year monitoring period were three times more likely to be healthy agers than those who remained inactive.
And those who engaged in regular physical activity for the whole eight years were seven times more likely to be healthy than those who did no exercise.
The authors wrote: “Sustained physical activity was prospectively associated with improved healthy ageing – absence of disease, freedom from disability, high cognitive and physical functioning, good mental health.
“Significant health benefits were even seen among participants who became physically active relatively late in life.
“The results support public health initiatives designed to engage older adults in physical activity.”
………………
This week in the gym was a tough one for me.
I officially entered my 60’s last week and I didn’t take it well.
We stayed home, cooked, huddled together with the dogs and cats and waited for the 24 hour period to pass.
This was not the me I used to know.
That person would raise a middle finger to the wind and pull a gym PR.
This time it was different.
I felt depressed, vulnerable and perilously introspective.
Some call it rumination, a synonym for clinical depression in my book.
Instead of getting over it, I tried to walk through it.
The first day in the gym I suffered a nose bleed in the middle of my dead-lifts.
That blew my day because the bleeding wouldn’t stop.
The next day in the gym I suffered a a bout of hypoglycemia, which made me nauseous, forcing me to leave the gym to eat.
Then I started feeling these out of body experiences, coupled with extreme fatigue.
Yep, I was officially old and falling apart.
Life had it talons in me and I was completely and utterly fucked.
So I called my therapist who then told me that what I was experiencing was a late stage midlife crisis.
I’m beyond midlife by 15 years.
I think of it now as a late 3rd quarter reckoning.
I needed more facts to get through this, but I needed more hardcore facts to get through this so I called my Internist.
Blood work good. Arteries clear.
So what the hell was it?
I booked a 90 minute massage, talked to my girlfriend [who assumed I was losing my mind], then finally had a heart-to-heart with myself.
My nosebleed was caused by a strong anti-inflammatory that I happened to take the morning of a tough workout. Not advisable according to my physician it thins the blood, which can lead to nosebleeds under the pressure of heavy weights.
Note to self: If you want to take this drug, do so after a workout when blood pressure isn’t through the roof [with 450 pounds or more in my hands].
Done. No more nosebleeds.
Blood glucose levels fall when people like me don’t eat enough.
Was I not eating enough?
Not even close.
Subconsciously I have been cutting calories because I prefer to be extremely lean.
But it’s impossible to achieve the look I would like without the help of anabolic steroids, which I don’t take.
So I started concentrating on eating more, eating better, fueling my body in a very conscious and proactive way.
Suddenly, no more blood sugar crashes, fatigue gone, and I felt like myself again.
Funny how that works.
I bring all this up because a lot of things happen below the surface in men like me who feel like adolescents in the bodies of older men.
We’re forced to grow up again and again.
And that’s okay because constant maturity has never been a strong-suit of mine, and reality checks are just part of what keeps me going.
As most people know at this stage of the game, denial is the mother of misery.
This is a mostly ridiculous piece of filler tripe that panders to the free love narrative.
“It’s all good as long as you come home at night…at some point.”
This is crap.
Relationships are usually tugs of wars that, in the end, are far more fulfilling than they are anything else.
This is a good thing.
People who get bored with their spouses and decide that the best remedy is an affair are digressing back to the model of eroticism being the pinnacle of sexual achievement.
It is not anymore than a bump of heroin is the pinnacle of responsible decision making while in the throes of a depressive episode.
Men who take lovers – and vice versa – are escaping the hard work of relationship building, and they do take work like anything else worthwhile in life.
Short cuts always implode no matter how good the sex happened to be.
And while that memory may awaken something in an otherwise dormant relationship, it’s just the fantasy talking.
No one is better in bed, just more enthusiastic courtesy of a fleeting encounter.
And if anyone thinks their significant other doesn’t question the sudden change in mood, they’re delusional.
In short, affairs do nothing but bleed the life out of relationships no matter what your dick has to say about it.
Christie Brinkley, 62
Anyone who’s had any exposure to people of means knows that any physical resemblance to average people is a stretch.
For example, it is not uncommon for 50-year-old women to look younger than her actual years.
No lines, exceptionally fit, tanned and polished to perfection.
This takes time, money and the right culture group to keep them motivated.
And believe me when I tell you, what they have to lose by not keeping themselves in exemplary condition far outweighs the alternative.
Having said all of this, as a veteran of these byways, I can spot a 50 or 60 year old women a mile off.
Sure, they look great for their age, and certainly better than their less well off contemporaries. But make no mistake about it: they still look 50 or 60.
So while Ms. Brinkley looks great for her age, she is still 62 no matter how great she looks for 62.
The same applies to me, by the way.
We look great by comparison to others, but we’re still where we are no matter what any plastic surgeon has to say about it.
http://www.mirror.co.uk/3am/celebrity-news/mick-jaggers-very-unconventional-love-9419607
Mick Jagger, 73, is now on his 8th child with 29-year-old ballerina Melanie Hamrick.
As you might imagine, people have lots to say about this, mostly negative.
“He’s too old to have a child.”
“Their 44-year age difference is outrageous.”
“She’s a gold-digger.”
“He’s a lech.”
“The whole situation is perverted.”
It’s very easy to criticize people for their unconventional lifestyles.
But last time I checked, nobody put a bullet to Melanie’s head, and I’m sure the children will do just fine…
The article above is just one of many such articles appearing in every media format.
YOUNG BEAUTIFUL WOMEN TRAVEL THE WORLD WITH WEALTHY OLDER MEN
Blah blah blah
No news, right?
Women have been doing this for eons.
But today it’s a little different in that women have learned the art of compartmentalization, not unlike homicidal psychopaths who kill without sympathy or remorse and then attend a family picnic.
Of course, the women in question aren’t killing anyone.
They’re just playing a game that’s becoming culturally sanctioned.
That’s the difference.
Today its considered normal to go to Europe with someone you have no emotional interest in, while having a traditional relationship with a bartender back home.
You get your financial needs met by the older man of affluence and everything else met by the bartender.
People these days have wised up to the fact that you can’t have everything under one roof and this is the contemporary answer.
After all, as the Mercedes Benz commercials keep telling us, “you only deserve the very best.”
Apparently this applies to everyone from ex cons to street pimps.
JK Simmons, 61. Yea I know. It’s tough to recognize him.
This is the guy you’re probably familiar with, a bit younger, and before all the steroids. Still very fit, but not totally insane!
~~~
So what in god’s name does JK Simmons eat for breakfast? Steroids.
What does JK Simmons eat for lunch? Steroids.
What does JK Simmons eat for dinner? Steroids.
And in case you’re wondering what in the hell JK Simmons is getting so jacked for, apparently it’s for his new “Justice League” role.
~~~
Most of you are familiar with the concept of reincarnation, but at my gym, it’s taken quite literally for good reason.
Average guys you’ve seen around the gym for years – decades in some cases – suddenly reappear, almost unrecognizable, with muscle chiseled like Italian marble, and attitudes to match.
No longer are they just some office guy with a wife, two children and a chronic headache.
Now they’re a Marvel Comics character, performing enormous feats of strength overnight, while shedding bodyfat and building huge mass at the same time.
How does this happen? How does such tremendous transformation in size and attitude occur at such an alarming rate?
How do you think?
How does a distance athlete, for example, maintain so much mass and leanness burning tens of thousands of calories a week — without any strength training?!?
S T E R O I D S
There is NO OTHER WAY to accomplish this feat of preternatural transformation without help from big pharma.
Am I knocking steroid use? Hell no. I’m just calling bullshit on those who refuse to admit the obvious.
Older men of means, and particularly the more vain among us, do not wish to fade out slowly.
They want to run hard, play hard, and look good at any and all cost – cost being the operative word because nothing in life is free, and I’m not talking about the cost of medication.
~~~
What’s fueling all of this is a loophole in the medical industry that allows physicians to deal steroids under the auspices of hormone replacement therapy.
It’s been going on for many, many years, and finally, the advertising has paid off.
Now any Internist with an average practice can become a multi-millionaire dealing testosterone, HGH and a litany of other related drugs to affluent older patients who want another shot at youth.
This is considered normal in many circles, mine included.
~~~
I bring all this up because most everything you ever read on the Internet about older men achieving these super-human physiques through hard training, diet and rest is absurd.
This doesn’t mean you can’t be fit and strong at 60.
What it does mean, however, is that without drugs, you’ll have to lower the baseline if you’re interested in getting anywhere close to reality without blowing your brains over a goal no human can otherwise achieve.
~~~
PHYSICIANS CATCH ON TO THE GRAVY TRAIN
I remember just a few years ago when money started drying up for physicians that alternative income sources started popping up all over town.
Most of them were Botox and Juvederm parties where Internists, for example, would invite 100 of their friends over for injections over cocktails at $500 a pop.
If the parties were big enough, they would offer greater discounts.
This went on for a while until a new breed of doctors started offering testosterone to their patients with “low-testosterone.”
The market for testosterone was ten times more lucrative because it required weekly injections, rather than injections once every two years.
Making things even better for them is the fact that patients don’t have to take blood tests, just have a conversation with the physician about how you don’t feel at 60 the way you did at 25.
Slam dunk.
If you’re a in the 45-65 demographic and spend a lot of your time in the gym, you will have noticed a proliferation of unbelievably shredded, ripped and insanely muscled guys.
There a reason for that, and spending time in the gym is only part of the story.
…………….
At 60, I’m smack in the middle of the Baby Boom.
I’m also very athletic, having spent most of my life practicing good nutrition, getting adequate rest, and going to the gym regularly.
But like I said, I’m 60, not 25.
More specifically, my body does not respond to movement and force the way it once did.
Does this mean I can no longer compete in sports, or that I look like crap?
No.
I still hold the USAPL title for the masters dead-lift at this writing.
But things do change.
I have to work harder to keep my belly fat in check. And while I’m still lean and muscular, I’m not shredded and cut.
Then there’s the whole energy thing, as in I don’t have as much of it as I once did.
I need more reset time, more recovery.
So what happens if i decide one day that I want to do triathlons, but still maintain muscle mass and strength? And while I’m at it that I also want a chiseled midsection and striated arms and legs?
Now I’ve got a problem because I no longer have the testosterone levels necessary to achieve all of that at the same time.
So like many men my age [myself excluded], there are scores of “wellness” clinics all over time where men can get prescriptions for “bio-identical” testosterone including a wide array of other “supplements.”.
Now I can run 5 miles a day, swim for an hour and do 3 hours on an exercise bike, while at the same time maintain mass.
See how this works?
You can have everything, be everything.
Of course, that’s not exactly the way it works because life on this highway is a bitch because you have to pay dearly to play.
………………
Without getting into all of the internal side-effects of the drugs, I’ll just focus on the things we can see:
1] The infamous ”big gut” or distended stomach.
A lot of steroid users look fat in spite of the fact that their bodyfat percentages are surprisingly low.
What causes the big guts is usually a combination of bother steroids and HGH [human growth hormone].
If someone uses HGH and/or insulin, you can be pretty damn sure that person is also on steroids … and god knows what else.
2] Disproportionate development of upper body muscles
A steroid user’s upper body muscles (traps, shoulders, neck, pecs, back and especially lats) are often disproportionately large compared to his lower body musculature.
This is due to the fact that upper body muscles have more androgen receptors than other muscles that respond better to resistance training.
This is also why new steroid users see their shoulder, traps and back explode like atomic bombs in the first few steroid cycles.
Of course, leg and torso muscles grow as well but never as fast.
This is what causes the ”V-shape” in roid users who normally wouldn’t otherwise have the genetics to produce such a wide shoulder/thin waist proportionality.
Exceptions:
1] Some of us are born with incredibly good genetics, but there’s a difference between good genes and something preternatural, particularly in older men.
2] Some people only train upper body and never do legs, but again, it never, ever looks like steroids are the culprit. Those of us who are in the gym regularly know the difference, believe me.
3) Gynecomastia or Bitch Tits
What looks like the growth of female breasts in the below picture is due to the exogenous testosterone (from anabolic steroids) entering the body and converting to estrogen, estradiol through a process called aromatization, thanks to the enzyme aromatase.
4) Skin problems caused by steroid use
Levels of hormones such as testosterone play a significant role in sebaceous glands and potentially can cause acne outbursts, especially on the back.
Although many professional pretend to have it all figured out, acne is now well understood yet but it is well accepted that testosterone plays a role.
4a] Stretch marks
Stretch marks are not a direct side effect of steroid use.
During the first few steroid cycles and user goes through, diet and sleep staying in check, the user will experience explosive muscle growth.
Thus, the skin may not adapt quickly enough to this change, and therefore, permanent stretch marks will occur.
Normally they appear in the upper lats (on the sides), on the sides of the pectorals and sometimes on biceps.
5] Sudden increase in muscle mass after years of stagnation … or just being a little guy.
If you’ve been going to the same gym for while you get used to the same guys hitting the same machines every day without making any significant gains.
Then all of a sudden they lose all their fat and gain 25 pounds of muscle in 3 months.
On top of that they can train for two hours without getting tired or falling victim to over-training.
Now you know how this happens.
SUMMARY
Five good ways to recognize a steroid user :
Big guts or distended stomach;
Preferential development of the upper body muscles, especially lats;
Gynecomastia or bitch tits;
Stretch marks and/or acne;
Unreasonably fast body transformation.
Bottom line:
I don’t care what people do.
You’re not fooling any of us.
Be man enough to admit it.
But according to a new study by British company CollectPlus, there’s an age at which we should find a new way to be stylish.
And that age … is 53.
Their thesis is that shopping for new pairs past this age isn’t worth the trouble, because one in 10 half-centurions try on six pairs and spend five days looking just to find one pair that fits.
Of course, I know men half my age who try on ten times that number and still come up empty-handed, particularly if they workout.
Nonetheless, the article claims that the process is so traumatic that 6 percent reportedly burst into tears.
To be frank, I don’t know a single woman or man any age who doesn’t experience some degree of trauma when trying on jeans.
Most of it has to do with dressing room lighting.
The rest involves a designer’s idea of exactly who they want to wear their jeans, which may not involve you.
The key to a successful shopping experience is to rule out body dysmorphia and/or a lack of self-actualization, which most therapists are capable of addressing.
Once you get past that you can wear whatever the hell you want.
But you’ll still have to deal with the crappy overhead fluorescent lighting…even at high end retailers.
Why they do this is beyond me.