The “Gala”

There was a time not long ago when I loved being the center of attention.

“Flatter flatter flatter!”

I was struggling through an endless series of speed bumps to nowhere that I medicated into oblivion through fleeting relationships and, still people clapped.

Of course, I was young and handsome and well spoken, and therefore, “in demand” as such things go.

These assets alone eclipsed whatever was absent everywhere else, as evidenced in the hostess-CEO paradigm.

So like others of my kind, I let the endorphin rushes fuel fantasies of where my new encounters might lead…night after night after night.

But as time passed and my career grew, I found that I needed more tangible affirmation in order to maintain self-esteem.

I was getting older and youth was no longer the hook. So what was?

It had to come from within, but how? as the need for external affirmation felt like an addiction to painkillers?

Where was that now lost screw that kept the joints rattling?

I was becoming unhinged.

Then, in my mid 50’s, I started coming out of it.

I was one of the lucky ones, as others around me lost everything to time, desperate moves and bad luck.

As cliché as it sounds, I began to find meaning in sharing my life with someone else, and everything else started to fade.

I started to find that going back to the social till bled a little more of me, leaving me empty and unfulfilled.

While I still appreciated public acknowledgement of my work, I saw it all very differently, as simple self-expression, a way of working through issues in my life, rather than a veiled quest for self-aggrandizement.

I know that for the most part, praise is just posturing, something people feel compelled to express in a particular social context.

But what really mattered to them was money and power.

Even when they are genuinely impressed with an artist’s work, their feelings are ephemeral, fleeting and largely meaningless.

They will move on to the next cocktail function, cherry-pick another item of interest, and on it will go, forever.

In the end, no one really cares unless they receive something of equal measure.

For most it’s the public acknowledgement that they are of powerful social standing, transcendent of art.

In their minds, they are the bedrock, the unassailable…oligarchs of an otherwise trivial world.

Of course, challenges do arise [to my great amusement], particularly when such people are in the company of the equally rich and very famous.

I love all the fraying at the edges of vanity as they maneuver themselves back into the ring.

We all find our niches in the world, places that affirm us, reflect our standings and values, that don’t obliterate our self-esteem.

I live in a neighborhood of my peers, and spend time socializing with people who, for the most part, share my values, beliefs and social standing.

I no longer need or want anything from anyone else.

I’m not here to take, but to share.

I have already paid my dues many times over and no longer walk into a situation with my hands out.

If people like what they see, if it has some meaning for them, great.

Either way, I am no longer willing to sell myself for anyone’s approval.

Socialites do what they do for personal gain.

Whether it’s Look at me, how wealthy I am, how extravagant my clothing, how elite my connections…or…How the hell do I get into this club so I can move out of my apartment, it’s a game I’m no longer willing to play.

For those of you who wish to gain access to the right parties, hosted by the right people with an eye on their bank accounts, you know where to go and what to do.

Bullet Points of Interest:

1] People tend to do what they do for personal gain, even when they are the ones “giving.”

2] Nothing is ever free, even when people are throwing something at you.

3] Life is about checks and balances, usually literally.

4] People you like are usually those you’ve vetted over time, not people you meet at cocktail functions.

5] Fund raisers are usually a subtle dance around who’s got the biggest “dick,” both men and women.

6] Hanger’s on are like sous-chefs waiting for the big dog to fall into a vat of boiling grease.

7] Art is worth nothing to most people unless Christie’s auctions it.

8] Opportunism is gaining access to something you can’t find within yourself.

9] Everyone uses everyone for everything on some level, even if it’s a good laugh. So it’s all about levels.

10] While socialites serve a useful purpose in society, nobody cares who they are if they’re not raining money.

Venting is cathartic. It’s why I write and shoot pictures.

Riffing Off the Past: How Some Boomers Stay Relevant

Jan 18, 2009; Glendale, AZ, USA; NFL on FOX analyst Terry Bradshaw during the trophy presentation following the NFC Championship Game between the Philadelphia Eagles and the Arizona Cardinals at University of Phoenix Stadium. The Cardinals won the game 32-25 to advance to Super Bowl XLIII. Mandatory Credit: Chris Morrison-US PRESSWIRE [Via MerlinFTP Drop]

Mandatory Credit: Chris Morrison-US PRESSWIRE [Via MerlinFTP Drop]

If I were a famous retired pro athlete trying to figure out what to do with the rest of my life, I might consider a career in sportscasting.

I’d have immediate sponsorship interest, and therefore, a viable shot at chapter 2 of an already illustrious career.

I could also have a home life and time to travel, given the fact that sportscasting isn’t exactly a 9-5 job.

We see this all the time within the ranks of the rich and famous.

In fact, some say “once famous, always so.”

America loves underdogs, particularly those who’ve already climbed the mountain and are ready to do it all over again.

But what about a guy who was successful in something that didn’t earn him international fame, notoriety, and thus, cultural relevance?

His commodity value is now relative to what he did, not what he wants to do now that his career is, for all intents and purposes, over.

And people wonder why so many successful older men freak out.

I’ll elaborate…[and offer a few solutions].

~~~

The 45 to 64 group that makes up nearly half of all new startups in the country, increasing 19 percent since 1996. The older market has seen the most significant growth over the last 15 years.

But as we all know, starting up a new business isn’t a cakewalk for most.

For one thing, there’s FUNDING.

If you’re not famous, you’re less likely to have sponsors beating down the doors.

Adding fuel to the fire, you got your butt kicked in the downturn and are less willing to risk retirement savings on a new venture that’s by it’s very nature, risky.

The next issue is WORK-LIFE BALANCE.

Rigid schedules, family sacrifices…the realities of doing what you had to do at the beginning of the journey.

If you’re not Terry Bradshaw, you need to know that no one’s doing anything but you – probably 12 hours a day.

This dovetails nicely with the final issue: BOUNDARIES.

You may be good at one thing, but not something else…like managing people.

You could outsource, but that’s not cheap and you still have to oversee the work.

SUMMARY

If you’re not already rich and famous, get used to the IRS considering anything you do a hobby.

They’re not dumb.

They know you won’t risk more than you absolutely have to, and that after a certain point you see it as something you enjoy that also helps defray taxes.

This is why they assess a “hobby” tax on successful older people who try to start new businesses and then write off the losses.

No one in their right mind wouldn’t do this since so much money is already being spent trying to make something work.

From personal experience, all I can tell you is this:

1] If you’re not rich and famous and had a career that is still viable, try consulting.

I know lots of retired lawyers who do freelance consulting on the side.

All you need is a cellphone and list of contacts – not a brick and mortar structure filled with expensive equipment and people.

2] If you don’t mind breaking even, or operating at a slight loss, understand that eventually you will have to pay the IRS for your indulgences.

3] If you are rich and famous, do whatever the hell you want.

While you’ll still have to show up once in a while, you’ll still feel relevant.

Just ask Keith Richards.

What Constitutes “Wealthy” to Urban Boomers

Living paycheck to paycheck while making a combined $500,000 a year is considered “normal.”

No Seriously.

Financial Samurai ran an article not long ago titled “Scraping by on $500,000 A Year.”

It was a good start in defining “wealth” against “expenses” in big cities.

Here’s the aforementioned article:

http://www.financialsamurai.com/scraping-by-on-500000-a-year-high-income-earners-struggling/

~~~

In any major metro area of the United States, a reasonably priced older home in a reasonably nice neighborhood [read: reasonably nice, not top of the line] starts at around $1,000,000.

Anything less is either a small condo or a tear-down.

I know, right.

In order to qualify to purchase one of these homes, you’ll need an income of approximately $300,000 no matter what anybody tells you to the contrary, including yourself.

It also warrants noting that 6000 ft. lots are priced somewhere in the $850,000 range, and with construction costs for a custom home on the same lot running about $1,200,000, you have to double your earnings.

You’ve now in over 2.1 million and haven’t forked over a single electricity bill, not to mention property taxes that will run in the $55,000 range…and I haven’t even started calculating the cost of a gold-digger.

This is why so many homes around here [and in places like, say, Beverly Hills] are held in family estates, and then gifted to offspring in the form of nest eggs.

All the kids have to do then is cover are property taxes and upkeep, which means they can get by on $250,000, as long as they don’t have kids, own $100,000 cars, or take vacations.

Hell, private school education alone rivals property taxes, so you can see where this is going.

No wonder people who earn $500,000 consider themselves upper middle class.

Of course, if they earned $500,000 in income and had 5 million in a diversified investment portfolio, then they’d most likely consider themselves upper, upper middle class.

Doing the math, they’d be looking at a yield around $400,000 on the 5 mil taxed as capital gains, and $500,000 taxed at 39%.

Now they could take three vacations and still save the $7300.00 at the end of the year.

As for Financial Samurai‘s breakdown…

Interesting breakdown, but that “$7300” left over wouldn’t have a shot in hell of making it to the savings account for most people I know.

Why?

Because 3 vacations a year for a total of “$18,000 a year” is a joke. It’s easily twice that amount.

Round trip business class tickets alone from Houston to Los Angeles are in the $1500 range per person.

Hotel rooms in the “One king bed, no sitting area” will run $685.00 per night, with small suites starting in the $1700.00/night range at places like the Beverly Wilshire in Los Angeles.

You also must accept the fact that miscellaneous expenses are going to fall in the $1500.00 range even if you don’t happen to wander into Barney’s.

You can see where this is going.

HOW THE “AFFLUENT” SEE REAL WEALTH

The following is a letter copied verbatim from the web from a very successful couple.

While some of it may shock you, it’s representative of how many in my general demographic see real wealth.

“I have no idea how anyone could live on $500,000 a year. I make $1.0 million a year as an equity partner in a large international law firm and through real estate investing. My wife makes $1.5 million as a cosmetic surgeon. We live in DC. We have 2 kids. After all of the taxes, childcare, mortgage payments, car payments, etc., we are literally living paycheck to paycheck. Our house is about 2.5 million, nice but not exorbitant. We each drive 911s and we have a farm in the country and a house at the Eastern Shore. Again- nice, but hardly movie-star living and there are many people who have much nicer farms and shore houses than we do. I think that to live comfortably in a high priced area like DC, you really need $4 million a year. This will allow you to save some money and live an extremely comfortable life style. Fortunately, we are relatively early in our careers– early 40’s. Within the next 3-5 years, we will be at $4 million. There really is not a moment to lose in this game if you want to live comfortably without worrying about money.”

You can’t make this shit up.

Now you know why $500,000 a year is chicken scratch.

LESSONS LEARNED

1] Be an equity partner in a large international law firm or investment house.

2] Be a successful plastic surgeon.

3] Be an a-list celebrity.

4] Be a world-class pro athlete.

5] Be a member of the lucky sperm bank.

Why Wealthy Divorced Women Don’t Remarry, But Men Do

http://www.marketwatch.com/story/first-wives-say-i-dont-to-second-marriages-2013-10-24

Why are wealthy divorced women more likely to decide to remain single? “It’s much harder for divorced males to be alone than females,” says Fran Walfish, a psychotherapist in Beverly Hills, Calif. Unlike men, she says, “a woman’s ego cannot bear to tolerate a man using her for her money. She needs to know she is loved—rich or poor—flaws and all.”

~~~

Wait for it!

More than 83% of divorced men back on the dating market would consider marriage within the next five years, according to a survey of 5,000 millionaire members of the dating site MillionaireMatch.com.

Only 5% said “never again,” and 11% said they would consider remarrying after five years.

Divorced female millionaires were at the opposite end of the scale: A mere 32% said they would consider remarrying in the next 5 years, and 70% said they’d never marry again or would wait 10 years or more.

Shocked?

I’m not.

Here’s why:

1] Women bond, while men isolate.

2] Older men can date women any age, regardless of motive [both motives], while women require a specific motive.

3] An older man’s vitality is replenished through exposure to youth and beauty. For women, it’s the opposite. Youth and beauty remind them to check their wills.

4] Love is not at the top of an older man’s list of must-haves in a relationship. It is the opposite for women which is why they bond with other women and call it a day.

5] Men need challenges. Without them there is no purpose to live.

Without Savings Boomers Totally and Completely Screwed [with a few exceptions]

As everyone this age already knows, life is not exactly a joyride in the absence of cash.

You look down the road and there’s nothing to see but a tunnel and a light because there is nothing else.

http://www.fool.com/investing/general/2015/06/07/baby-boomers-face-it-if-youre-not-rich-now-youll-n.aspx

As everyone by now knows, the most important thing in the world is health followed closely by money.

The rest can wait.

According to Vanguard’s How America Saves 2014, which provides statistics about the more than 3 million people who have a defined contribution retirement plan managed by Vanguard, the median 401(k) balance for those over 55 was less than $75,000 in 2013:

How

Please explain to me how the hell you’re going to hang out in Cabo or Aspen without a large career income or passive income from investments?

You’re not.

You’re going to stay home with your cats and hope your death is swift and painless because the rest isn’t worth the journey.

TWO EXCEPTIONS

1] Yogis

2] Tenured University Professors

In the first case, the senior yogi may live in a tree, but women in his classes find his acetic existence and peaceful vibe an extraordinarily attractive alternative to the wolves of Wall Street.

So he can expect to get laid by beautiful women who don’t care what he doesn’t have until they do, at which time they go back to the wolves for another round.

Tenured university professors make a couple hundred grand a year, never lose their jobs, get Summers off, and hold the destinies of their students in their hands.

It kinda’ sells itself.

The only problem is that most women at ivy league schools envision large homes in nice neighborhoods, expensive cars, private schools for their kids, and at least 3 vacations a year.

Needless to say, his salary won’t cut that, nor will his eventual savings which are destined for social security support.

So we’re back to square one.

With this as a backdrop, how exactly do Baby Boomers acquire enough capital to retire comfortably without robbing the Federal Reserve or winning a slip and fall against Kroger?

First, they have to have something of value to sell that offers windfall potential.

What about their homes?

Yea, I’m laughing because homeowners between age 50 and 65 are most likely to carry a mortgage.

The percentage rose from 60% in 1992 to more than 70% by 2010.

What about saving more money?

For guys 50 and older looking at potentially 20 more years of putting whatever away, if you can invest an extra $5,000 per year for the next 15 years, you would have an extra $146,000 at age 65:

Returns

If you can leave it alone until 70, you could have approximately $220,000 in added net worth based on historical stock market averages.

But what kind of life are we looking at here?

Most people in better neighborhoods spend $200,000 in 6 months just maintaining their lifestyles.

You’ll be watching every single solitary bill, praying your roof doesn’t leak, and clipping coupons while annoying the people in line behind you at Whole Foods.

You’re better off dead.

The sad truth of the matter is that your priorities were ass-backwards back in your 20’s when you thought you were immortal because you could nail dates at the drop of a hat even if you couldn’t afford to take them to Jack-In-The-Box.

It didn’t take long to notice that no matter what you looked like all the wealthy older men were taking your girlfriends to the Bahamas for the weekend.

Then it dawned on you that youth and beauty only work for highly-precisioned gold-diggers of exceptional beauty; actors, models and entertainers with the wings of angels; and singers like Robert Plant.

And since you couldn’t find a niche for yourself in any of the above, you were screwed.

After all, what’s the point in getting old if you can’t afford to enjoy it?

People are always talking about people pursuing things they love.

But understand that love is always secondary to common sense.

If piano tuning does not pave the way for millions in an investment account by age 50, do something you hate.

You’ll love yourself in the end.

POSTSCRIPT

For you older men of average means who have daughters of exceptional beauty, please explain to them how to leverage what they do have in exchange for everything you don’t so you can piggy-back on their success.

You’re welcome.

~~~

A FEW TRUTHS ABOUT MONEY

1] Lots of money won’t make you happy, but not enough of it will make you miserable.

2] One million dollar homes in large cities are often tear downs situated in up and coming neighborhoods.

3] 250k/ year is considered upper middle class.

4] When politicians talk about raising taxes on “millionaires and billionaires” they’re including everyone who falls in #3.

5] The average 0ne bedroom suite at a luxury hotel property is $1000/night and everything else is a la carte.

6] Dining out in a big city usually costs $200 on up with wine and tip.

7] The average luxury automobile starts in the $80,000 range.

8] Whole Foods bills usually run 20k-30k/year with wine.

9] Luxury handbags usually run $2000, and women’s shoes, $500-1000 which you’ll need to keep in mind if you happen to live with a woman.

10] First Class airfare from Houston to Los Angeles is in the $1200 to $1400 range. Double it if you’re taking your girlfriend.

Aging is a Bitter Pill [No Wonder We’re All in Denial]

Liam Neeson, 63 ‘Never been healthier…’ for 63.

Ahead of turning 63 on June , he said: ‘My birthday is a touchy subject. I’m going to be 63 — nobody wants to be 63! I’m getting old.

‘What I want more than anything is for it to be ignored. I just hate it and it makes me feel vulnerable. It’s such a private thing — the day you were born, the day you came out of your mother’s womb.

‘Some people hire a boat and do grand things like that, but I just get embarrassed about that sort of celebration and attention.’

~~~

What exactly is 63 supposed to look like?

Does anyone know?

As far as Hollywood is concerned, a 63-year-old actor is supposed to be fit, muscular, dashing…and yes, sexy.

A lot of this is projection, as many industry people are themselves middle age…and beyond.

But in the end it just gets down to pandering to a massive Baby Boomer market in denial.

This aside, how do a very select few 63-year-old men manage to maintain extraordinary levels of youthfulness?

1] Intense physical fitness regimens

2] Balanced diets

3] Low stress

4] Regular testosterone injections

5] Plastic surgery

6] Perfect styling

7] Flattering light

8] A willing suspension of disbelief on the part of audiences

9] Money and power

10] Dying famous at age 27.

~~~

Nobody wins this war.

We can be in spectacular shape at 63, but we’re still 63 no matter how imaginatively anyone spins it.

This is a particularly tough pill to swallow for older men of health and means.

They can afford to travel, dine at 5-star establishments, buy expensive toys, and date beautiful young men and women.

But the problem is that they have very little time to do it before the other show drops.

Think older man’s version of Ferris Bueller’s Day Off for adults and this begins to make sense.

This is why denial is my generation’s crucible.

Why are Middle-Aged Men Committing Suicide in Record Numbers?

In 2013, 78 per cent of the 6,233 suicides registered in the UK were men. That’s a rate of 19 deaths per 100,000 population.

That more men take their own lives than women is not new. But in 1981 the men’s total was only about double, or just under, the women’s.

Now it’s nearly four times as many.

Since 2007, in fact, baby boomers have had the highest rate of suicide of any age group in the United States.

Historically, people between the ages of 40 and 64 have had one of the lowest rates.

To complicate matters, baby boomers are now sliding into the over-65 demographic, an age group that historically has had one of the highest suicide rates.

Making matters worse, suicides among middle-aged men with mental health issues have soared by 73% since 2006, which may be attributed to a combination of alcohol, job loss and debt, as compiled by the University of Manchester’s National Confidential Inquiry into Suicide and Homicide by People with Mental Illness.

Oh boy. Want more?

“Our findings show that within mental health care, middle-aged men are particularly at risk,” said Prof Louis Appleby, the director of NCISH who was formerly the government’s mental health tsar and leads the national suicide prevention strategy. “The problem is not simply that they don’t seek help – they are already under mental health care – so we have to understand better the stresses men in this age group face.”

How about this?

More men in the UK have died by suicide in the past year than all British soldiers fighting in all wars since 1945.

I’m neither a Sociologist or Psychiatrist. In fact, my only authority in this area is interpersonal exchange and an open heart, for which I have earned several Doctoral Degrees.

Men my age and socioeconomic niche are, generally speaking, over-achievers. They made their “piles” working hard, passionately over many years.

Many have been married and divorced a few times over.

The majority have children somewhere.

Now they’re smack in the middle of the Baby Boom generation, with nowhere to go and nothing to do that they haven’t already been done a thousand times before.

Only this time around, they’re older – a lot older – with far less time to enjoy life the way they did when the journey started.

It’s a small window of opportunity in which to reinvent oneself before everything becomes a hobble along a windswept beach on the edge of oblivion.

With this as a backdrop, here are my 5 top reasons middle-aged men off themselves:

1] Loneliness

Heterosexual men in mid-life are dependent primarily on female partners for emotional support.

One reason for this is that they’ve never explored anything beyond sports stats with their “friends.”

Women, on the other hand, maintain their independent relationships throughout life – divorce notwithstanding – which is one reason they outlive us.

To wit, suicidal thoughts and suicide attempts were three times higher among divorced men, and two times higher among separated men compared to married.

This is the quintessential dichotomy about men: While we love sex, we love relationships more.

2]Reluctance to seek help

Professor Shirley Reynolds, from Reading University, said one of the reasons for the rise in suicides is the fact only around ’15 per cent of men with depression and anxiety seek help’.

Most men my age practice intimacy-avoidance. They’d rather swallow a pack of Gillette straight razors than open up about clinical depression.

For one thing, depression is not manly. Men don’t suffer depression unless it’s tied to warfare, in which case it’s called PTSD, an acceptable acronym.

Anything else is an indication that you’re either gay and in denial, or didn’t get into enough fistfights when you were a kid.

In either case, you’re screwed in the eyes of middle-aged frat boys who are themselves gay, and in denial.

3] Money

Okay, I know a few people who put bullets in their heads when the market crashed in 2008.

Not having any money after have a shit-ton of it sucks more than just about anything else, excluding colon cancer, which is a close second.

You lose your house, your cars, your vacations…and usually, your wife.

So now you have nothing at age “60” and have no interest in starting over at Dairy Queen.

I get it. Use the gun. 30 years mopping floors or flipping burgers just isn’t worth it.

Plus you’ll never get laid again as long as you do happen to live.

4] Feminism

Many men bought into the notion that marrying super-achiever women – the ones who handle all of the traditionally male responsibilities – was a novel idea…until the women in question left them for real men who could buy and sell them a thousand times, which earned their respect.

It’s been my experience that women want men to be men in the traditional sense no matter what they say to the contrary. I’m not talking about some archaic master-servant relationship, but one where the man is clearly the head of the household everyone look up to.

But these days older men are caught in a cross-fire of conflicting expectations about what it means to be a man. This usually means that when things go South, they don’t have the coping skills to handle the downward spiral.

The bottom line here is that men should take care of themselves first – and everyone else – second.

5] Irrelevance

Okay, so your career is winding down, the kids are out of the house, and your ex-wife is a colossal bitch. What the hell are you going to do with yourself? You already proved to the world that you could become CEO of some star-up and make a pile of money.

Now what?

That job is done, but when people ask you what the hell you’re doing with yourself, you have nothing to say. This means you’re only as good as your last performance – which, by the way, was 10 years ago. Not good. Very bad, in fact. Particularly at society cocktail functions.

Men are inextricably tied to what they do professionally, so if you’re not doing what you were once doing, then what the hell are you doing?

Men need an answer.

If they don’t have one, they dwell on what to say to people.

This often leads to introspection, as in the meaning of life kind of crap and then hookers, drugs and a shotgun blast to silence the noise.

Believe me, older men need a good back story to survive. Otherwise, the only thing anyone will be interested in is conning them out of whatever money they happen to have left over from their glory days.

SUMMARY

Getting older sucks. The best you can hope for is money in the bank, good health, and a competent psychiatrist.

Note that money was the first on my list of must-haves because without it you’re probably better off dead.

How else are you going to afford the psychiatrist?

~~~

For more information, here’s a good article on depression in older men:

http://www.fiftyisthenewfifty.com/mid-life-crisis-depression-or-both/

How Much Boomers [REALLY] Need to Ditch Their Day Jobs and Follow Their Dreams?

Table #1

Starting out this discussion with lifespan projections is already a bummer, but don’t worry. It gets worse.

Table #2

If you’re a Baby Boomer [51-68 yrs of age] making 300k/yr, a 60-year-old will need approximately 11.7 times that amount properly invested in order to realize the same income – and that’s assuming market conditions are stable. They’re not.

So let’s get real.

As I state in my book, “Urban Dystrophy,” on Amazon, a starter portfolio starts at around $5,000,000.

The reason I say this is because most guys I know like to do things like date beautiful women [or men], travel, dine out, and buy cool shit – all of which cost money. Lots of it.

None of this is a problem if your day job is bringing in 300k and your retirement money is – for the most part – rolled back into your portfolio.

But what if there is no day job and you’re living off of passive income alone [investments]?

Now the numbers have to change drastically, because in order to earn 300k on a 3.5 mil portfolio, you’ll have to be either an investment genius or selling crack on the side.

In my world [i.e., urban, educated, worldly, sophisticated – probably entitled], you’ll need approximately $7.5 mil to live a very nice – but not extravagant – lifestyle without having to worry about spending it all.

~~~

$7.5 million dollars is a lot of money.

Most guys making $600k/year for 25 years don’t have anywhere close to that amount invested.

Hell, most guys making a 1 million a year for 25 years don’t have that amount in savings.

How is this possible?

Easy.

On a 1 million dollar a year salary, you walk home with approximately $600k, or $50k/month, net-net.

If you own a $2 million dollar home, which is considered normal in these circles, you’re paying $50-$60k in annual property taxes alone on a 30-year house note of $1.5 million [after a 500k down payment], which lands you in the $10k/month range – excluding everything that goes into running a house, like utilities, repairs, and so on.

Add a second home somewhere in the mountains [a small place], a wife, two kids in private schools, and a couple of exotic vacations a year and you have about 150k left to invest, if you’re disciplined.

At the end of 25 years, you will have saved approximately $3,750,000 plus whatever your portfolio has generated over that time period, which most people place at about 8% /year [on good years].

Weird, huh?

And you thought everyone had at least $20 mil in the bank.

~~~

With $7.5 million well invested, you can comfortably take out 500k/yr, enough to live a great life without worries.

This doesn’t mean you can run out an buy yachts, travel in private jets, or buy a big place in Aspen.

But you can own a $2 mil home, put two cars in the driveway, shop at Whole Foods, and stay in 5-star hotel properties suites accompanied by reasonably well-equipped gold-diggers who might also love you for who you are, though most gold-diggers with the capacity to feel actual human emotions usually start in the $10 mil range.

What Kids Need to Know About Money: Reality Television, Notwithstanding.

Misleading advice about money is everywhere, but the most egregious is this:

“Do what you love and the money will come.”

Seriously?

In the real world it reads more like this:

“Do what you love, but make damn sure that it can provide the kind of lifestyle you envision for yourself 30 years down the road.”

Unless you have a verifiable, iron-clad trust fund that cannot be changed or manipulated in someone else’s favor [including another family member], or hail from a celebrity family with a predilection towards generosity, or have a certain talent no one else on the planet has, you’re screwed.

I grew up around kids who bragged about their parents’ multimillion dollar businesses, only to find themselves – at middle age – in a corner office at the same firm on a salary that could never make the down payment on that house on the hill with the big swimming pool.

See, most businesses aren’t worth dirt to their owners until they’re sold.

There are exceptions, but not many.

The sole purpose of starting – and growing – a business is to one day sell it, not love it through sickness and health.

I say this because of all the things in the world you need count on, death withstanding, it’s money.

You can’t live on love or fame or happiness.

Something has to underwrite all of them. Think of it as blood supply provided by the almighty dollar.

Sorry to dust up your fantasies.

Imagine yourself a middle-aged man with no money in the bank and you’re better off with a bullet in your head.

In fact, everyone is better of with a bullet in your head.

Sage advice:

Money first, everything else second.

Then you can learn to play the piano, write a book, or grow your own vegetables and everyone will think you’re a genius.

You’re welcome.

April 2024
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