How To Avoid “Old Man Flat Butt”

RL0Zov6Nothing quite says old like a flat butt!

I can’t help but visualize a hole drilled into a sheet of plywood.

Anyway, I’ve discussed this issue on more occasions than I care to count because I see more of this than I care to see.   


Okay, we all age and die.


Now that that’s out of the way, let’s get started.


There are many reasons why men suffer flat butts.

Here are a few:

1] Low Testosterone Levels

Among other things, Low T decreases sex drive, and thus, the motivation to look one’s best.

Why would a guy with Low T focus on the shape of his butt when his biggest concern is how to get through the rest of his life without joint pain?

Looking good in a pair of designer jeans is not his objective. 

But raise his T levels and all of a sudden he’s back in the gym, visiting a divorce attorney and signing on to an Internet dating service.

2] The Endurance-Sports-Addicted

You’ll notice that as men age they many do more endurance sports, like triathlon where they swim, bike and run.

The reason for this is simple: They aren’t ballistic. You can swim, bike and run into a freaking trance until there’s nothing left of you but skin and bones.

Soon, testosterone levels flatten out along with any and all body fat, and suddenly, the butt disappears.

While these guys tend to look great in the pool, put them in clothing and it’s like – where did he go?

3] The Clinically Depressed

Some men are more accepting of life’s changes and just go with the flow. Their wives are old and fat and they’re resigned to a life of the just happy to be alive mentality.

What they’re happy about I don’t know.

These are men who are shocked to meet someone like me who dares point out that none of this is inevitable, that they can do something about their deteriorated conditions and fading relevance that reinforces their decline.

Unfortunately, no matter how hard I try to get through, many have lived for so long in this depressive and vegetative mindset that no matter what anybody says to them, it’s like a dream that vanishes the second they open their eyes and see that same old world.

It’s like Stockholm Syndrome where they keep going back to what’s familiar.

It bears noting that many older men accept depression as a normal part of aging and life in general, and therefore, cannot fathom a world in its absence.


1] As men age, total testosterone levels decline. Free testosterone (testosterone not bound in the blood to sex hormone-binding globulin (SHBG)) levels decline more rapidly than total testosterone. Studies have shown that total testosterone decreases by approximately 30% in healthy men between the ages of 25 and 75. Free testosterone levels decline even more significantly with decreases of approximately 50%. However, only about 1 in 5 men have a total testosterone level that falls below the normal range. Fortunately, many healthy lifestyle choices, such as heavy resistance training and aerobic exercise, quality sleep, and a healthy diet can actually increase testosterone production naturally.

Will Testosterone Replacement Therapy Cure All of the Ailments Associated with Aging?


Testosterone replacement therapy will not make up for poor diet, lack of exercise, and a generally unhealthy lifestyle. It is not a magic bullet, nor will it reverse aging.

For those with low testosterone, combining proper diet, exercise, good sleep, and other positive lifestyle modifications with testosterone replacement therapy can make you stronger and leaner and feel better.

Of course, it’s kind of a Catch-22, because when your levels are low you’re not motivated to make changes in your lifestyle unless you’re surrounded by people who believe that life doesn’t end at 60.

2] Studies consistently show that high-volume endurance exercises reduces baseline androgen hormones by 20-40 percent. The androgen hormones include testosterone, estrogen, and DHEA.

Endurance exercise leads to larger acute elevations of the key stress hormones cortisol. Excess cortisol has a catabolic effect on muscle tissue, breaking it down and leading to persistent inflammation.

In other words, you can’t put on a tight, round butt when your hormones are flat.

3] Depression as normal.

Feeling sad or emotional is the main symptom of depression. But for many men that isn’t the primary depression symptom. For example, headaches, digestive problems, fatigue, irritability or chronic pain can sometimes indicate depression.

You may not recognize how much your symptoms affect you, or you may not want to admit to yourself or to anyone else that you’re depressed. But ignoring, suppressing or masking depression with unhealthy behavior won’t make it go away.

From my experience, many older men simply accept depression as a normal part of the aging process. Why would being older not make one depressed?

For one thing, you look worse than you did when you were young.

But what many men fail to see is that you don’t have to look like twigs from dried shrubs glued together and then coated in a thin sheet of rubber.



See a primary care physician for a blood test, a psychiatrist for a clinical diagnosis and a personal trainer to keep you out of a nursing home.

Then do what women do and wear that butt with pride.

They’ll thank you for it, trust me.


1] Squats

2] Gluteus kickbacks

3] Pelvic tilts

4] Lunges

5] Bridges

6] Deadlifts

7] Step-ups

8] Deep leg presses

You’re welcome.