Post Category → older men

Steroid Use Among Boomers Goes Airborne [Apparently]

warmingup2

Me at 60, sans steroids… [aka., testosterone, anabolic steroids, Human Growth Hormone, et al…]

I’m a sort of freak where fitness is concerned.

I train with guys half my age are usually dead, metaphorically speaking.

But this does require a bit more qualification: No one who is “all natural” can keep up with me.

In gym parlance, “all natural” means that the individual in question does not take pharmaceutical grade testosterone and/or anabolic steroids.

Men my age who do take Testosterone and/or anabolic steroids have an edge over me in both recovery and endurance.

Their recovery is twice as fast and their raw strength is well above 30% of what it would be without the needles, and I use that percentage conservatively.

With this as a snapshot of human life in the fast lane, understand that the pressure capitulate to what’s become the status quo is tougher than ever before.

Why the popularity of drug use?

1] We’re older, and thus, have less time to enjoy the time we have left.

2] We have the funds necessary to afford the drugs.

3] We’re vain.

4] We’re easily addicted. The concept of life outside the gym is about as ridiculous as trying to convince a junkie that lemon juice and water is a healthier alternative to heroin and vodka.

So everyone’s a “lifer.”

Is there hope?

No.

My generation will continue to buy and promote drug use because it’s faster and easier than spending 5 hours in the gym – and still walking away with a distended midsection.

It all gets down to what’s quick, easy and purchasable under the law.

I get it.

But like everything else in life that makes – and to some extent – delivers on great promises, there is a darker side.

But what the hell … live for the moment, die the next…it’s all good.

Fading away just isn’t an option.

In my case, I have to work harder, take more time to recover, eat perfectly...and most importantly, have a full life outside the gym.

I realize my priorities are warped, particularly the last one.

The Cure for Existential Angst, Guaranteed.

Three years ago my trainer stitched this together this little as a reminder to me that aging doesn’t always follow a predictable path, that it is possible to slow it all down — including the fading relevance older men often feel when they can no longer throw a baseball without looking like an ex-president during one of those ceremonial first pitches.

Life only wins when you fade, not when you die. j.r.

Can You Spot a 21st Century Gold Digger? I Doubt It.

gold3-copyCouple of nice girls just looking for love…

MillennialMen1

A few buds out for a game and shot at a vacation on someone else’s dime…

It cuts both ways.

“In the long history of humankind (and animal kind, too) those who learned to collaborate and improvise most effectively have prevailed.”
― Charles Darwin

Here are two articles you might find interesting:

http://nypost.com/2014/04/16/can-you-spot-gold-digger/

http://www.forbes.com/sites/larissafaw/2015/07/28/watch-out-ladies-millennial-men-are-gold-diggers/#5b768b19646a

Gold-digging [aka prostitution] has been around for the entire length and breath of human history.

The problem today, however, is that motive is no longer obvious. In fact, it’s evolved in stealth to what many consider an art form…where PhD level courses will soon be necessary to decode the tell-tale subtleties and innuendo.

~~~

POINTS OF INTEREST on GOLD-DIGGING [in general]

1] Gold diggers are such a problem in NYC, one woman has set up an agency that proclaims it will weed them out.

2] Cautious men need to know that women they’re interested in have jobs with sizable incomes [six figures is expected], be independent and live alone.

3] Successful women seek out equally successful men because, like men, they expect a “perfect 10” for their efforts. 

4] “Millennial males are less likely than males of the Gen X and Boomer generations to equate romance with happiness,” says Denise Delahorne, SVP Group Strategy Director, DDB US.

5] “Overall, they [Millennial males] are a group of people who believe they are better than other people, and their own happiness and well being takes precedence over the needs of others.”

6] “Millennials overall, and Millennial men in particular, are more likely to think their own happiness is more important than the happiness of others Millennials overall, and Millennial men in particular, are also more likely to think that they deserve to be famous and hope to be famous one day.”

7] “I think we can’t lose sight of the fact that this is a generation that grew up at a time when attitudes about marriage and divorce really changed.” 

8] “...we certainly can’t ignore the fact that they [Millennial men] feel that they can always get out of the marriage if they want to — and this is certainly something that we see frequently in popular culture.”

9] Millennial men are also more likely to want to have a prenuptial agreement than males of other generations (32% vs. 25% of Gen X males and 17% of Boomer males) perhaps because they are more likely to be viewing marriage as a financial/contractual arrangement as much as a romantic partnership.

10] There are five million members on SeekingArrangement. Overall, the site has 3.8 million Sugar Babies, and 12% are male: 460,000. Moreover, this is an 84% jump in male Sugar Baby membership from the start of 2014.

ACCORDING TO THE POST ARTICLE, HERE ARE 5 WAYS TO SPOT A GOLD-DIGGER

Matchmaker Janis Spindel asks ladies looking to date her high-end male clients to pen a 2,500-word bio and fill out an extensive questionnaire. Here are her five rules for spotting a gold digger:

1. A woman who is obsessed with dating a successful man — and knowing what his salary is.

2. A lack of a job is a telltale sign a woman is looking for someone to support her. “Women must have [jobs],” says Spindel. “It gives them a sense of confidence, allows them to support themselves and keeps them busy during the day.”

3. She complains about Spindel’s fee of $1,000 for a one-on-one meeting.

4. A woman who makes unreasonable demands: “If they tell me they must date a man with a plane, I say ‘Sayonara.’”

5. A lady who asks the wrong questions: “When they ask me how many homes my client has, they’re inquiring for the wrong reasons.”

COMMENTS

These points are all far too obvious, as most successful gold-diggers could pass a polygraph with flying colors.

FINAL COMMENTS

How did we get here?

Millennials say feminism is the root of the problem.

They tell me…

1] Women are waiting longer before marriage and children…so they’re no settling down.

2] They also have strong career motives, which they also expect of their mates.

3] They feel entitled to the same sexual freedom as men, which yields a new world man with a vagina.

So what’s the incentive for young women to date young men?

Nothing, really.

Unless, of course, it’s just sex, in which case they need an online alias if they want to protect their reputations and high-end jobs from blackmail and other forms of extortion.

~~~

In closing, here are some passages from my new book, Urban Dystrophy, currently selling like hotcakes on Amazon.

A FEW KEY FACTS TO MALE BABY-BOOMERS OF A CERTAIN SOCIOECONOMIC DEMOGRAPHIC

When you’re twenty-five, women who seriously date you do so for your looks, personality, education, and ability to earn (or somehow, inherit).

When you’re fifty, women who resemble the ones you dated at twenty-five (because they are twenty-five) do so for the perceived security you are able to provide them—both financial and emotional—coupled with a predisposition towards generosity.

Gold diggers flourish in big cities where there are few predators and an abundant food source. Please do not confuse the metaphor.

Watch out for three vulnerabilities they look to target—frustration, boredom, and privilege—the same ingredients necessary to transform a corporate executive with a Harvard MBA into a blackmail statistic.

It doesn’t matter how many boards you sit on, how many ex-wives you have, or how much your children love you. When everything falls apart, including your children, gold-diggers only care about your financial condition.

Remember that women interested in the likes of you operate in survival mode. While it has been postulated that some possess feelings that border on empathy—particularly towards their young, and in some instances, their spouses—survival still hinges on instinct.

You may live in a large urban area because you enjoy the culture, shopping experience, and fine dining, but you’re also a line item on someone else’s balance sheet.

Every man like you with a penchant for youth and beauty will inevitably meet a woman anxious to exploit him.

Men never grow up. If they did, gold-diggers would go extinct.

In case you’re wondering, the same rules apply to women when approaching a male member of this group. It’s a gender-neutral career path.

In exchange for a certain lifestyle, gold-diggers are prepared to barter whatever they have in exchange for whatever they don’t. While this may sound cold and calculating in the context of “love,” some of the country’s most celebrated philanthropists were once strippers, showgirls, and Pilates instructors. (No offense to Pilates instructors.)

Psychopathology of the Pot Belly

beer-belly-holding-beers

Allow me preface this discussion with the following: I do not personally know anyone my age who looks like the individual in the above photograph.

~~~

Yesterday I was standing in the meats section of a grocery store when I noticed a man in his mid-50’s sporting what is commonly referred to as a “pot belly.”

In the upper thresholds of obesity, it most closely resembles that of a pregnant woman at full term, which is 39 weeks to 40 weeks and 6 days.

Like women in such a condition, the protuberance is surprisingly hard, and as round as a basketball at 4 times regulation size, but similar pressure.

As I stood there waiting for him to finish ordering his 22 pounds of heavily marbled red bloody meat, I couldn’t help but wonder what would happen if the butcher hacked it all off in one fell swoop.

Would the man thank him?

See, if it weren’t for the Volvo-sized anomaly situated at his midsection, the balance of his anatomy would appear completely normal.

This is why people think these things.

Kids do it all the time with Legos, so stop judging.

Without formal medical analysis, I feel comfortable speculating that he and men like him suffer type-2 diabetes, impotence, high blood pressure, high cholesterol and depression, the later of which having paved the way for the aforementioned 4.

~~~

With this in mind, some people eat when they’re depressed.

Why they do this is beyond me.

When I was depressed I would run, swim, bike, and lift weights – sometimes all day – and often, night – until the demons went back to bed.

Not only was this a successful ritual, but I came out of it looking and feeling better.

Of course, this has been my ritual for the better part of my life, including all of it.

So what the hell happened to the guy next to me?

Medical Realities

After age 40, the natural reduction in testosterone means excess calories are often stored as visceral fat. We also naturally lose muscle mass as we age, the key word here being ‘naturally,’ because if you do nothing we will lose everything. This also applies to money, if this helps.

If we exercise, however, we can pretty much check that one off the list.

Unfortunately, most men don’t exercise regularly, so they lose muscle mass, and their metabolisms stop burning at a solid rate. When you lose muscle — about 1 pound per year after age 30 — your metabolism declines, and it becomes easier to gain fat, which often goes straight to the belly in men.

The Psychopathology

With these facts in mind, if a man were largely [no puns] inactive his entire life, and at age 40 his testosterone levels started to slip, he’d get hit like a bag of bricks.

Not only would he have no lean muscle mass to keep pace with the hormonal attrition, but the necessary adjustments to his lifestyle would be as tough as substituting heroin for treadmills in the mind of a junkie.

I do know a couple of large men who are big enough overall to pull it off without completely embarrassing themselves.

One of them, in particular, was a collegiate athlete with a commanding presence.

He, like Chris Christie, is an achiever with an otherwise full life.

This is rare. But in spite of their relatively healthy self-esteems, health still takes a hit. A big one.

I once heard a Bariatric surgeon say that fat is genetic, and therefore, men who are obese can’t help themselves without lap-band surgery.

At this writing he is anorexic after beating his own fat addiction.

I assume genetic includes psychiatric predispositions.

Solutions

1] Contrary to popular opinion, the first order of business is to seek guidance from a psychiatrist.

2] The second order of business is to find a good Internist who will run complete blood analysis followed by a stress EKG and heart scan.

3] Third order of business is to go back to the psychiatrist and give him or her the results. You will start from a low baseline from which you will rebuild what has been lost since childhood.

4] Your spouse will not understand any of this and in many cases pay a hit man to kill you if any of this starts to work and you rethink your living will [and marriage]. Understand that part of your therapy will involve your life choices, including your choice in mates. It’s all tied together.

5] Once you get a handle [no puns] on who you are – and as a result, what happened along the way – you will realize that while your genetics played a role in all of it, your mental health sealed the deal.

Dennis Quaid at 61

0105-dennis-quaid-ripped-hawaii-akmgsi-4http://www.tmz.com/2016/01/05/dennis-quaid-abs-photo/

Dennis Quaid is 6’0″, #175 at what looks to be well below 10% body fat.

By comparison, I’m 6’1″, #230 at 13% body fat, which places me in the top 1% of my age group.

Most people consider this extraordinarily fit.

But I’m not shredded like a slab of turkey jerky, and herein lies the rub.

See, in order to put on – and hold – lean muscle mass at less then 10% body fat [at age 61!], you’ll need help of the preternatural kind.

To wit, Quaid has more lean, angular mass on his shoulders and arms than any man his age can normally produce without “help.”

I’m not accusing him of steroid use because I don’t know him. Maybe he’s a genetic freak. I’ve seen a few in my day.

For everyone else, pulling off tons of lean mass with low body fat is impossible without tinkering with testosterone levels.

What? You think we’re immortal?

Since when do men our age look like Quaid?

Some of you may consider him too lean, too small…kind of ragged, wasted even.

But for men who want this look, it can be acquired at “wellness” clinics and individual physicians operating throughout the United States.

REALITY

1] If you want to perform at levels similar to what you achieved at age 30, you will need a lot more than hard work coupled with a hope and a prayer. 

2] I’m not judging, just exposing the truth.

3] You have to decide if the consequences of steroid use are worth the risks.

4] Denial is the mother of delusion.

5] I don’t care how Dennis Quaid chooses to live his life. His job is to entertain, not inspire.

Just trying to keep it real around here.

Rich Men Prefer Skinny Women: New Research Exposé

street-style-leather-moto-jacket-over-the-shoulders-paris-fashion-week-ray-ban-wayfarer-sunglasses-layered-necklaces-simple-white-dress-peek-a-boo-bra-metallic-waist-thin-belt-small-chaiSs I stated many times before [on this blog], wealthy women prefer to date their financial equals and those withing a few years of their age.

Men? Not so much [on either count].

According to researchers at Chapman University in Orange, Calif., a new study to be published in the January 2016 edition of the peer-reviewed academic journal “Personality and Individual Differences,” validates what I have always believed, that men with more education had strong preferences for female partners who were “good looking,” “slender,” and “younger.” Some 95% of men with an advanced degree said it was “essential” that their partner was “good looking” versus 77% of those with a high school education or less, and 84% of those men said it was essential that their partner was slender versus just 12% of those with a high school education or less.

So what does it all mean?

A depressing confirmation of the worst gender stereotypes that suggests the dating game has not progressed much in the last 100 years? And maybe 1000 if you want to get technical about it.

Using an example from the animal kingdom, “Female bower birds select males with the nicest nest, and in many insects, the female selects a male who offers her a nice gift of prey he has captured.”

Translation: Women prefer nice neighborhoods with swimming pools, just like insects.

Furthermore men prefer slender bodies, which are associated with youth.

As the body’s metabolism slows as one grows older and, slender physiques could represent fertility for men.

I might also add that, beyond the specter of fertility, slender women look better in Chanel and are easier to physically dominate, which is a big deal for many.

The study may help people understand why the advertising industry (and society) puts so much emphasis on women being thin. And it may also throw light on why men strive so aggressively for higher income and assertively negotiate for raises.

Their income clearly affects not only their ability to pay for dates but also their likelihood of attracting a beautiful young, slender partner who looks good in Chanel.

As we all know, men are more visual than women and women have a stronger need to be taken care of both emotionally and financially.

So people with desirable traits are in a position to be more selective.

The study found that both genders reported nearly equally that being with someone physically attractive “to them” is important, which is at least hopeful because it allows for physical imperfections — not the unattainable physical flawlessness we’re bombarded with every day in the media.

Nonetheless, I have seen men with more money than God check each and every line item and then choose the more perfect human female the planet has ever witnessed. Of course, what people want and what they actually get are two different things.
If, for example, a man wants a physically flawless woman with a warm heart, he usually gets only one of them. There’s only so much you can expect from a mating dynamic based on a cold-blooded exchange of commodities.

REAL WORLD PREFERENCES OF AFFLUENT OLDER MEN AND THE WOMEN IN THEIR LIVES:

1] Slender women are preferred because they look best in designer apparel.

2] Slender women are preferred because they look better educated, and thus, more sophisticated.

3] Slender women are preferred because they are easy to physically dominate.

4] Slender women are preferred because in more sophisticated circles, image is everything.

5] Slender women are preferred because the chances of them becoming obese down the road are far less probable. 

Notice I didn’t mention anything whatsoever about character.

This is because men with money assume that women who crave it will just fall in line.

And while they appear to do just that, their reasons for doing have more to do with attracting even wealthier men who expect the same thing.

10 Essential New Year’s Resolutions [You Can Actually Achieve]

2016-resolutions-chalkboard

If you’re anything like me, you’ve noticed that you’re older than you used to be.

With this in mind, here are a few things you can do to improve your situation:

1] Accept the fact that media and reality are two entirely different things, even if you’re the only one buying it.

2] Understand that your sense of relevance is tied to the health of both your physical body and your financial portfolio in equal measure. 

3] Know that dating beautiful young women is a minefield, not because they’re difficult to find, but because they’re difficult to read.

4] Understand that women who embrace their own objectivity will expect you to pay for it.

5] Look at life more from the perspective of a human food chain and you’ll find love in the most unexpected places.

6] Embrace psychotherapy when you feel uncomfortable talking to anyone else, but understand that it can be as addictive as heroin, and sometimes, just as expensive.  

7] Practice mindfulness before delusion plays stand in for sanity.

8] Realize that life doesn’t care about you, so you have to figure our how to care about yourself. It still won’t care, but whatever. 

9] Accept the fact that not taking your meds is the same as committing infidelity. 

10] Worrying about not achieving your New Year’s resolutions is worse than simply not achieving them, so think carefully before committing to anything.

Now you have 10 New Year’s resolutions that will serve you better than diets and exercise by a factor of 1000.

What’s [really] the Best Workout for Baby Boomers?

5d99a3dfe96d85f1caff06438b6de62456yr Old Crossfit Masters Competitor Ken Greaves

I was scouring the web for inspirational articles covering training regimens for masters athletes – and let me tell you – there aren’t many.

Instead, what I came across this absurd piece written by two 20-year-olds who went on to win a contest for their advice to older men and women.

Here’s a teaser on the topic of cardio: The American College of Sports Medicine recommends working at a level that is “hard enough to raise your heart rate and break a sweat,” but still allows one “to carry on a conversation.” This ensures that the body is being stimulated but not so intensely that there is a risk of overexertion. 

Comment: If I can carry on a conversation while doing cardio, I’m not training. [Note to you 20-year-olds on your Iphones while walking on treadmills].

http://www.bodybuilding.com/fun/best_over_60_workout.htm

Myth #1:

“Because hypertrophy and maximal force production are not likely to be goals for the 60 and up crowd, free weights and muscle specialization will not be necessary.”

Really? Says who?

As a 60-year-old power-lifter and cross-fit enthusiast, I train primarily with free weights because they allow my entire body to participate in the stabilization process. I also focus on certain muscle groups that help protect my body when lifting heavy.

No wonder I don’t have back problems. People who tend to sit on machines all day do. So yes, hypertrophy is a big deal as is maximal force production.

Myth #2:

“While teens may be able to handle three days of lifting per week with seven days of cardio, this is not realistic for older adults.”

I train with weights 3 days a week and incorporate 5 days of cross-fit style cardio. I take the weekends off because i have a life outside the gym.  And by the way, most teens can’t keep up with my workouts.

Myth #3

“Intensity, too is different [for older athletes], as more tender joints and less conditioned lungs and other muscles are potential issues for older adults to consider.”

While joint pain is always making itself known in one area or another, it’s been doing the same thing since college. So I just work around it until it heals.

Myth #4

“While free weights are often favored by serious gym-goers and exercise enthusiasts, machines are preferable for older adults.”

I don’t know anyone my age at my gym who doesn’t use free weights.

Myth #5

“Machine movements do not rely on stabilizing muscles as much, which is important as older adults may be somewhat deconditioned and will not have sufficiently developed muscles for complex free weight exercises.”

It is true that some adults are deconditioned, but for those of us who train regularly, this is simply not applicable.

Myth #6

“At the age of 60, the body is mostly incapable of building large quantities of new muscle.”

This has to be the most ridiculous comment I have ever read.

Myth #7

“The main goal of working out should be to build some strength and reduce the risk for disease (primarily heart disease). Therefore, a workout should simply be to get the blood flowing and to build some strength without causing any serious injury in the process.”

If my trainer ever said this to me, I’d fire him.

Myth #8

“Supplementing protein shakes is unnecessary and pointless. At this age, the body can’t digest and absorb protein easily, which will result in excess bodily waste and weight gain from supplementation.”

I don’t know whether to laugh or cry for this little idiot.

SUMMARY

20-year-olds haven’t a clue about fitness routines for adult athletes, nor do they have any knowledge of our psychological predispositions.

In my gym, I routinely challenge college kids to jump in with me for sets, but so many have suffered injuries that they rarely show up anymore.

🙂

So, what REALLY are the best workouts for baby Boomers?

ANSWER: It’s a rhetorical question.

Feeling Blue About Your Age? Try This.

When I’m at the gym training, older people [my age and much older] look at me like I’m out of my mind.

They’re only partly right.

I am driven to perform in an abnormal way for men my age.

I guess they assume I a recovering drug addict swapping addictions, or someone in therapy.

Like I said, partly right.

Long story short, I’m an outsider in every sense of the word.

First, my workouts look like actual workouts, rather than strolls around a track on a failing hip, porous bones, and bulging discs.

Some refer to such people as blood sacks.

To the point, I could trip and fall in the gym and the worse case scenario might be a spilled sports drink, not the complete annihilation of my skeletal structure – hence blood sack.

This is where you want to be at this stage of the game.

Then there’s the mental toughness that working out reinforces.

You feel in possession of yourself and relevant in the context of survival.

This is a big deal to older men, believe me.

If you feel weak, you feel irrelevant no matter what else you have going on in your favor.

While success is a great thing, success and good health are better.

Just ask anyone who doesn’t have either, or both.