Affluent 50 to 60-Something Men Still Choose Beauty First

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“…all older women hear (and thus believe) that older men are only looking for much younger women. OK, many of them are. But are they getting them? Not really, unless they’re wealthy and powerful. (And I have always believed that it’s good to identify those men and remove them from the 50-something dating pool ASAP; I’m not interested in men like that so move along, men, and good luck!”). Vicki Larson, journalist

I hate to tell you people this, but a simple fact can save you a lot of heartache:

Reasonably attractive, healthy and successful older men have lots of choices when it comes to choosing partners.

Too many, in most cases, which is why so many of them are single or serial monogamists, the emphasis on serial.

~~~

When it gets down to it, money and power are the great equalizers.

Conversely, youth and beauty are also commodities openly traded on the human stock exchange.

Whether you’re young or old, you have different assets to barter, but something is always for sale.

Most of the older successful guys I know have an exacting set of standards they apply to the acquired women in their lives.

These are the very same standards, by the way, they applied to their ex-wives before they divorced them 20 years later.

The fact is successful men prefer to date younger women is because THEY CAN.

Generally speaking, women over the age of 17 are not attracted to youth.

They’re attracted to confidence and power.

Therefore when a beautiful woman in her 20s or 30s meets a man who is in his 50s, with the world in the palm of his hands, it’s sexy and alluring to her.

His age becomes irrelevant.

Walk into any upscale restaurant or bar and what you will see are drop-dead gorgeous women accompanying successful older men.

These women were not forced at gunpoint, believe me.

To many men I know, it’s almost irrelevant whether these women are truly in love with them or merely out to make better lives for themselves.

It matters that they are in the company of a beautiful, intelligent and uncomplicated young woman.

The rest they leave to a suspension of disbelief.

She is everything their wives once were before time took its pound of flesh and soul.

No wonder so many middle aged women without much to leverage scream and yell about all of this.

But put them in the position to do what these young women are doing and you wouldn’t hear a peep.

The fact is average men and women receive average returns, and exceptional beauty and youth will always win out where successful older men are concerned.

Is it fair?

No.

But pretending that “real men” don’t want younger women is delusion. That they want an equal is naive at best, disastrous at worst.

According to one NYC matchmaker, this is the normal course of things:

“I recently had a 78-year-old client who wouldn’t even consider a woman older than 50. If you are 25 years old as you are reading this, let me put this in perspective: That would be like dating a 55-year-old.

That brings me to why I can’t take on women as clients; and no, misogyny has nothing to do with it. In this tough singles market, if a man pays top dollar for a matchmaker, he expects nothing less than a 29-year-old model.  As a result, I cannot find a husband for a 47-year-old schoolteacher with two kids and three mortgages.”

So where do relatively pretty, average 40-plus women find men of means?

They don’t.

What they can and do find are men of equal value, which is not a particularly palatable prospect for most.

My recommendation to such women:

1] Join a book club.

2] Enroll in a continuing education class at a local college.

3] Attend art openings.

4] Get out of the house – maximize exposure.

5] Go back to therapy.

Nature is neither kind nor compassionate, but the good news is that there are exceptions to every rule.

Just not very many.

How Not to Keep a Good Man Down.

 

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What I’m about to tell you cuts a deep swath between what you were and what many of you are becoming.

Most men don’t have the balls to say [out loud] any of what I’m about to tell you, but saying it is the only way to help catalyze change in what’s often a foot-dragging passage into twilight.

Buckle up.

~~~

Over these past decades I’ve learned a few things about being a man that weigh on all of us after enough water’s under the bridge.

#1

The first is the personal assessment quiz, where we sum up all of our perceived accomplishments and hope that our backstories are sellable on the open market.

I say ‘open market’ because unless you live in a vacuum, you have an audience that determines your viability. I know. This sounds like every psychiatrist’s worst nightmare, but it’s still true.

We live in a society filled with people, not open land filled with livestock.

Remember, this is a blog about urban life, not rural isolationism.

In this world, our world, we need to matter. Some call it relevance. And while many claim this to be an exercise in pure nihilism and self-destruction, it’s critical to our emotional well being that we see our lives as having been well spent.

The resulting self-esteem becomes our fuel, our motivation to go on long after the glory years of imagined immortality and endless promise have passed.

But let me reiterate that we must pass muster with the world around us before we get the fuel. We can’t just fantasize it into being.

The world around us is a cold, objective force. It sees us as fully formed entities, each with a script in our hands that we read to ourselves before closing our eyes at night, hoping our dreams don’t contradict the plot lines.

Appreciating the gravity of this is an essential part of maintaining dignity no matter how much you try to ignore or deny it.

Okay, so let’s say we’re happy with what we’ve done with our lives up to this juncture. We have financial security and we’re proud of what we’ve done.

Great.

Now what?

#2

Now we have to figure out how to maintain what we’ve built so it doesn’t all come crashing down on top of us.

I’m talking about our physical health, and more specifically, our physical being; how we see ourselves relative to those around us, no matter what their age.

Like everything else in my life, I need to feel in possession of myself physically, to be physically strong, in control, and able to defend myself.

I’m sure that more than a few of you reading this will wonder why men our age [Baby Boomers] should give a crap about what sounds like an older man’s delusions of grandeur, but I don’t know any of you.

The men I do know care. A lot. They don’t want to be walked all over like party confetti. They live with purpose and dignity.

And while a few engage in endurance sports, especially anorexics, who swap one addiction for another, the answer lies in the weight room. Yes, being a man means lifting heavy weight. I know I know. I’m a superficial jackass who has no idea what brings true fulfillment to anyone but myself, but you’re still dead wrong.

Many of the men I’m around are luminaries in their respective fields, ranging in age from late 40’s to early 80’s. But one thing they share is a desire to build and/or maintain physical strength. In other words, no matter what they’ve done, if they’re wasting away it’s irrelevant. Soon, self esteem will erode away all that they’ve built, and they’ll end up dead long before you read about them in the obituaries.

This brings to mind a guy in my gym in his early 80’s who is not only a celebrated surgeon, but a world champion masters power lifter.

You think he feels irrelevant?

The respect he receives from people around him is palpable.

My motto: Be strong, live well.

#3

Our personal lives are the final cog in our wheels of fortune. While I cannot pretend to speak for gay men and their relationships, I do know a thing or two about living with women, which is kind of like living with an extraterrestrial biological life form, identical human DNA, notwithstanding.

Like #1 and #2, how we feel in the context of our relationships is inextricably tied to how we feel as men.

The first thing we men know about ourselves is that our egos are fragile, particularly when we feel vulnerable. Thus, we need our masculinity validated daily. We need to feel loved; we need to feel attractive; and we need to feel capable.

That’s a lot of need, but miss an ounce of it at your peril.

Memorize this list so you don’t lose it:

A] Admire Us.

Compliment us on the things we’re good at and our physical qualities. Beat on us and we’ll stop making the house payments.

B] Brag on Us

The first time I heard a woman complaining about her husband’s “many” shortfalls, I suggested he leave her. In my mind, she breached the trust and left him out to dry.

C] Ask For Our Help

Ask us to show you how to do something or to give you advice on a tough situation. We’ll be more than happy to show you, believe me.

D] Never, Ever Cut Us Down No Matter What.

Make you man feel like an idiot and he will show you the door. Men have massive egos. Why this is I don’t know, but suspect it has something to do with having to kill things so the rest of his primordial family didn’t starve to death.

Never, ever discredit us or make snide comments about our appearance, abilities or performances, particularly around others.

E] Learn How to Listen.

Men may not be as talkative as women are, but we still have things to say and emotions to vent or bad days we want to discuss. While we’re more about fixing things than just talking for the sake of being heard, sometimes we like being heard so we can justify fixing things.

F] Respect Us.

Respect builds the foundation of our relationships. Without it, we will look for it elsewhere, believe me. Incessant nagging comes to mind. It’s like rat poison for human relationships.

G] Believe In Us

We want the women in our lives to be our biggest cheerleaders. We’ll do anything for someone who believes in us. Even if what we try to do doesn’t succeed by someone else’s standards, the fact that we gave it our best shot deserves praise and love.

H] Do Little Things For Us

Whether you leave a love note somewhere we’ll find it, stuff an Oreo under our pillow…or just wear something that we can’t seem to live without, JUST DO IT!

FINAL THOUGHTS

As men get older it’s even more important to affirm us. First, because we are no longer 25. Second, because no matter what we act like, we’re no longer in college and running track for NYU.

Of course, back then we were flat broke, our trust factor was zero, and and our apartments resembled the wolf dens you see at natural science museums across the country.

As women who’ve spent your fair share of time with men, you already know all these things.

This is just a reminder.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

No Signs of Slowing Down for Older Athletes

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George Haywood, 63, took home the gold in the 300-meter hurdles at the World Masters Athletic Championships last summer in Lyon, France. (Katherine Frey / The Washington Post)

http://www.chicagotribune.com/lifestyles/health/sc-fitness-golden-years-health-0224-20160216-story.html

For you skeptics, naysayers and apologists out there…

Drug Testing

Drug testing will be conducted at Perth 2016, following the procedures outlined by World Masters Athletics.

If selected for drug testing Competitors must declare any/all medications being used by them on the doping control form. Any athlete using a prohibited substance as defined in the Regulations, must apply for an exemption (TUE) to the WMA Anti-Doping and Medical Committee. Athletes taking or requiring exemption for a prohibited substance must apply to the WMA Medical Officer (Dr. Martine Prévost) for a TUE exemption (17 rue Léon Roby FR-87000 LIMOGES: FRANCE. Tel: 0033 607 949 507, email: prevost.ma@wanadoo.fr ) If an exemption is refused, the prohibited substance(s) concerned must not be used and should you be selected for testing and the test proves positive this may result in a suspension. Please note that no other medical certificate(s) will be accepted in substitution for a TUE certificate. If you are granted a TUE exemption certificate, this must be with you at all times along with proof of identification, and must be produced at the Doping Control Centre if you are selected for a drug test. Details of prohibited substances and all Anti-Doping procedures are available on the IAAF (www.iaaf.org) website, the WMA (www.world-masters-athletics.org) website and your IAAF Affiliated Federation. The Competitor’s Handbook in Perth will also contain details of the Anti-Doping Procedures to be undertaken during the championships.

 

“Functional Fitness” is Boomer-Speak for Training for Life

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Between 1980 and 2010, the number of 100-year-olds increased 66 percent. Baby boomers are now ages 52 to 70. By 2029, more than 20 percent of Americans will be over 65.

http://www.chicagotribune.com/lifestyles/health/sc-baby-boomer-functional-fitness-health-0413-20160408-story.html

Visualize for a moment doing the kinds of things you did as a young man.

You threw footballs, caught Frisbees, climbed trees, jumped over things, rolled and tumbled and generally speaking, took it all for granted.

Fast-forward 40 years and you’re lucky to drag your butt out of bed without pulling your back out.

Enter functional training.

Dan Ritchie co-founded Functional Aging Institute, which teaches fitness professionals how to train mature clients. Functional fitness means movements that help you in everyday life. Think cross-body and full-body motions, bending or picking something up off the floor. The goal is to build a body capable of real-life activities.

When I look at older guys in my gym, most appear to be one hell of a lot older then they actually are.

This is because they are a hell of a lot older then they should be for their age.

Many have forgotten how to do the things they used to do, while the rest have resigned themselves to the misconception that life robbed them blind while they were working and raising families.

In a way this is true.

Life only gives back what you put in. It doesn’t care what you do or how you do it. It’s just a bystander.

If you don’t care, it doesn’t care. Cause and effect. Period.

So it’s up to you to make the most of what’s left of your life, which could very well be a lot longer than you think – or longer than you’re prepared to endure.

Get a grip and take control of your health.

Your self-esteem will thank you.

Fact:

1] The number of Americans 62 and older is growing, with most of the increase expected by 2030.

2] Americans ages 62-plus have a net worth 40 percent higher than that age group did 25 years ago.

3] They don’t want to get old and sit around to die, otherwise known as dying in slow motion. They want to go on adventures, live life to the fullest.

And since they can afford to — if they have the functional capacity – most guys I know are now adding functional training to their psychotherapy regimen.

 

Sharp Increase in Older Men Going Under the Knife

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While there has only been a two percent overall increase in plastic surgeries from 2009 to 2010, the number of male cosmetic procedures have increased dramatically, say statistics from the American Society of Plastic Surgeons (ASPS).

The number of liposuction procedures performed on men rose seven percent, and the number of male facelifts doubled, by 14 percent.

Why such a relatively high increase in male procedures? 

1[ Economic woes [i.e., keeping their jobs]

2] Media bombardment [i.e., if you can afford to look your best, why not?]

People often consider cosmetic procedures to be just for women, says northern CA-based men’s mental health expert Will Courtenay, PhD, LCSW, and author of Dying to Be Men.

Just as sex roles between men and women are changing—more fathers are active parents than they used to be, he maintains—so is interest in cosmetic surgery.  “The fact is, manhood in America is changing rapidly,” Courtenay tells demo dirt. “And at least one in four men says he’d consider cosmetic surgery. And another one in five says he might. And for men, it’s often about staying in the race.” 

Washington, DC-based facial plastic surgeon Houtan Chaboki, MD says that he has noticed an increase in men getting procedures, even though they still comprise less than ten percent of cosmetic patients.

Most common, he notes, is rhinoplasty, which people get for various reasons.

However, the fastest growing market is face lift surgery, Chaboki says.

“More men seeking plastic surgery want to appear younger and compete in the workplace,” he says.

“Some working men who actually feel full of energy have the perception that others at work may see them as older, [and] less adaptable to change in a fast-moving economy.”

Dermatologist Debra Jaliman, MD started doing Botox in 1991 and says that more and more men have been requesting the treatment, among other things.

“I find that now many years later more men are doing Botox and fillers and lasers and freezing their fat, “she says.

Jaliman agrees that the main reason is the economy.  “We are in a competitive business environment and it’s also become more acceptable,” she adds.

The problems emerge when cosmetic surgery can’t remedy deeper-rooted self-esteem issues.

“Cosmetic surgery can be a misguided attempt to feel better,” Courtenay maintains. “Research shows that men who are dissatisfied with their physical appearance are more likely to suffer from poor self-esteem and depression. So, for these men, cosmetic surgery may make them look better, but they won’t feel better.”

The best surgery candidate, Courtenay says, is a man who is generally secure already.  

SUMMARY

Whether it’s to gain that competitive edge, or just bolster an already healthy self-esteem, nips and tucks appear are the way forward for most urban men I know.

Get used to it. I have.

Nothing is as it seems anywhere, anymore.

Fitness: ‘Magic Pill’ Against Mid-Life Depression

Worried Male

 

When you get older, you expect to be depressed.

By “older” I’m referring to Baby Boomers stuck between the 3rd and final chapters, or Purgatory in the absence of an obituary notice.

But I’m hopeful because I have one weapon up my sleeve capable of blowing a gaping hole in hell…

EXERCISE.

In the minds of many, however, what I undergo is hell.

But as everyone knows, if you want to stop feeling like crap you have to punish yourself.

Eventually, you’ll learn to enjoy it like the rest of us.

It’s kind of like healthy eating. You learn to appreciate the way clean food makes you feel, rather than focus on its taste.

Soon, you’ll convince yourself that steamed quinoa tastes better than a Big Mac.

As implausible as this may sound, it is critical that you embrace certain delusions at any and all cost.

Understand that nature wants you dead. Thus, it’s your job to earn it’s respect in order to stay alive.

Many guys throw in the towel because it’s just too much on top of everything else.

But there is nothing else without it.

A FEW FACTS

http://fitness.mercola.com/sites/fitness/archive/2015/01/23/brain-benefits-exercise.aspx

Super Ripped, Super Shredded Men Over 50 – and Reality

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Just so you know where I’m coming from, I’ve been active in the fitness lifestyle my entire life.

In fact, it could be argued that fitness interfered with my personal and professional life on more than one occasion, and over a period of many, many years.

Thus, to suggest in any way that I’m an outsider where this is concerned is naive.

I’ve been in this world, know the player-profiles, understand the mindset.

So let’s get real.

By the time you’re my age [60], things change. You can no longer pack on dense muscle while bleeding fat. It isn’t going to happen –– not naturally.

This means you’re going to need extra help, like testosterone supplementation coupled with 3 or 4 other pharmaceutical agents designed to “compliment” one another.

One helps build strength, another cuts inflammation…you get the point.

Going down this road is a conscious choice many men make when mortality is beating down the doors and there’s nothing left but an aging body.

The psychological profiles of these men are all similar: They are most often vain, arrogant, entitled and filled with rage.

Why?

Because there is nothing else in their lives to help mitigate the attrition.

They’re left with a disintegrating asset, rather than an expanding mind and soul; and asset on a collision course with destiny no matter how many syringes they jam into their bloated veins.

Do I feel the psychological pressure of mortality?

Absolutely. I feel it every day of my life, which is why I have a life beyond my physical body.

I know this is a shocking revelation to many, that there is anything at all worth exploring beyond the physical.

Surprise surprise.

My creative pursuits alone are a full time job, not to mention my relationship, which also includes two dogs and two cats as big as dogs.

This scenario is what most refer to as a balanced life, which does pull time away from workouts, perfect eating and regular blood work necessary to monitor elevated liver enzyme and PSA levels while on steroids.

In this sense, fitness can become ab addiction like alcoholism or drug addiction or sex addiction or gambling addiction or any of the other addictions that raid the dopamine mines and turn one’s life into a living nightmare of emptiness.

http://www.slate.com/articles/health_and_science/science/2013/07/what_is_dopamine_love_lust_sex_addiction_gambling_motivation_reward.html

For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. Newton’s Third law of Motion

But I’m not here to beat up on men who take care of themselves. Hardly.

I think men should take exemplary care of themselves, but to understand that we are all human, and to expect results beyong what the body will naturally deliver will require more than a healthy lifestyle.

Go back to the blood test. If it’s normal, the rest is up to you and the genetics you were born with.

But no matter what your genetics have to say about it, age is the Supreme Court of physicality.

You’re not getting out of life unscathed.

We all pay the price, which is why it is so critical for all of us as older men to have lives outside of the gym.

In the end, there is nothing more pathetic than an aging man with nothing to show for himself but low body fat and a dark tan.

Now you know why so many of us are punchlines.

“T-Therapy” [Testosterone] Under the Microscope

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http://www.forbes.com/sites/arleneweintraub/2015/03/24/why-all-those-testosterone-ads-constitute-disease-mongering/#21c1e2163043

A government committee discovered that, among a sample of nearly a quarter million men, as many as 21% had been given a prescription for testosterone despite not being tested for low-T.

In other words, physicians simply asked patients how they were feeling, and if the answer was anything like “I don’t seem to have the same energy I had at 17…” they got the drugs.

A FEW FACTS

In 2013, over 2 million people were prescribed T-therapy.

In 2014 the number doubled, and Androgel alone reaped $1.4 billion in sales.

In 2014 testosterone products, in general, reached $2.1 billion in sales.

Last year, 6.5 million prescriptions were written for or testosterone products. You can do the math yourself.

Late last year, a joint FDA advisory committee examined the therapy and its potential association with cardiovascular therapy, among other burgeoning issues and abuses.

The findings were shocking. In addition to not being tested for Low-T, 57% of men on T-therapy were also taking either one or several other cardiovascular medications, such as anticoagulants, antihypertensives, anti-platelet therapies, statins, and nitrates. How these medicines work together in the body is not known.

After the preliminary findings were in the FDA voted 20-to-1 to revise the labels of T drugs, including AbbVie’s AndroGel and Lilly’s Axiron to make it abundantly clear that the products should only be prescribed to men who seriously need it.

According to Bloomberg, this is having an effect on sales. For example, IMS Health’s sales alone have plummeted 6% in the first half of 2014 in the same period from the year before.

The National Institutes of Health is sponsoring a short trial comparing men on T with those on a placebo. These results should be quite interesting, as they’ll include information about sexual function and bone health.

I’ll keep you posted on this.

TV AND RADIO BOMBARDMENT

Keep these things in mind the next time you hear a TV or radio ad telling you to “talk to your doctor about low-T.” Even more importantly, pay attention when Physicians or “health” Clinics themselves run ads claiming that testosterone replacement for all aging men is the wave of the future, alongside healthy eating, exercise and a month a year in Aspen to reduce stress.

What these companies [and individuals] fail to mention in these ads is that lower testosterone levels is a natural part of aging, not a medical condition, and that there are very real, life-threatening side effects to these products.

According to Drug Recall Attorney’s Blog, millions of men bought the marketing gimmick, asking their doctors for prescriptions for testosterone products. Michael Seaburn was one of them. He started using Testim and AndroGel topical testosterone treatments. Within two years after starting these treatments, Seaburn had two heart attacks, suffering immense pain and anguish, loss of life’s pleasures, and significant economic losses.

Seaburn, like millions of other men, was not told testosterone treatments had strong links to heart complications, strokes and death. He claims companies like AbbVie purposefully encouraged men to view the normal signs of aging as a “condition,” that could be treated with products like AndroGel.

Sound familiar?

According to the article, “Not only were these companies investing in mass marketing, they were also paying for continuing medical education courses (CME), which doctors are required to take. Pharmaceutical companies and medical device manufacturers support CME programs regularly, to the chagrin of Congress and public advocates. A series of investigations between 2007 and 2009 revealed that these CME courses often acted as aggressive promotions of off-label drug uses (such as promoting testosterone therapy for men without diagnosed hypogonadism). Today, about one-quarter of CME income ($676 million) is from drug/device companies, who create course curriculum and hire faculty.

A review by Journal Sentinel and MedPage Today looked at 75 drug industry-funded testosterone therapy CME courses. Researchers found that a majority of the courses’ faculty were already on drug company payroll for speaking, consulting, and advising roles. These testosterone courses are another part of the effort to turn the natural aging process into a medical condition. Eli Lily alone spent $1.8 million to fund more than 25 testosterone-related CME courses between 2011 and 2014.

CME courses are supposed to be free of bias, but drug companies clearly use the platform as an opportunity to market products directly to doctors for off-label uses. The FDA has stridently stated testosterone products are not to be used in men with low testosterone due to aging, but doctors are prescribing them exactly for this use based largely on CME material. CME courses not only encourage off-label prescribing, but also downplay or completely conceal drug risks.”

At this writing, thousands of lawsuits have been filed against testosterone products companies, and the numbers continue to climb at an alarming rate.

WHAT YOU SHOULD KNOW

Testosterone therapy can contribute to…

1] Sleep apnea — a potentially serious sleep disorder in which breathing repeatedly stops and starts

2] Acne or other skin reactions

3] Noncancerous growth of the prostate (benign prostatic hyperplasia) and growth of existing prostate cancer

4] Enlarged breasts

5] Limitations in sperm production and testicle shrinkage

6] Increased risk of a blood clot forming in a deep vein (deep vein thrombosis), which could break loose, travel through your bloodstream and lodge in your lungs, blocking blood flow (pulmonary embolism)

7] Increased risk of heart disease.

~~~

FINAL THOUGHTS

At my health club, it is considered perfectly normal – even enlightened – to take pharmaceutical grade testosterone, either in pill form, gels or injectables.

As one man said to me “I lost belly fat without having to workout all day. I put on more lean mass just getting out of bed. I have a six pack I never knew I had. And my sex drive has become so strong that I now have a hooker on speed dial.” 

If you’re living in the moment, the side-effects of drug use pale in comparison to the short term results.

If this is your mindset, there’s a dealer on every street corner in Houston.

Remember that Testosterone use for many is like drug addiction.

In fact, many drug addicts, alcoholics and men with related compulsive personality disorders simply swap one addiction for another.

All are in complete denial about side effects until they hit rock bottom.

Before that happens – and it will happen – any good news that can siphoned from the flood of bad is used to justify their addictions.

See, it really doesn’t matter what the addiction is [i.e., drugs, sex, gambling, alcohol…etc].

What matters is how long you can keeping shuffling the deck before you run out of cards.

~~~

 

 

How To Avoid “Old Man Flat Butt”

RL0Zov6Nothing quite says old like a flat butt!

I can’t help but visualize a hole drilled into a sheet of plywood.

Anyway, I’ve discussed this issue on more occasions than I care to count because I see more of this than I care to see.   

~~~

Okay, we all age and die.

~~~

Now that that’s out of the way, let’s get started.

~~~

There are many reasons why men suffer flat butts.

Here are a few:

1] Low Testosterone Levels

Among other things, Low T decreases sex drive, and thus, the motivation to look one’s best.

Why would a guy with Low T focus on the shape of his butt when his biggest concern is how to get through the rest of his life without joint pain?

Looking good in a pair of designer jeans is not his objective. 

But raise his T levels and all of a sudden he’s back in the gym, visiting a divorce attorney and signing on to an Internet dating service.

2] The Endurance-Sports-Addicted

You’ll notice that as men age they many do more endurance sports, like triathlon where they swim, bike and run.

The reason for this is simple: They aren’t ballistic. You can swim, bike and run into a freaking trance until there’s nothing left of you but skin and bones.

Soon, testosterone levels flatten out along with any and all body fat, and suddenly, the butt disappears.

While these guys tend to look great in the pool, put them in clothing and it’s like – where did he go?

3] The Clinically Depressed

Some men are more accepting of life’s changes and just go with the flow. Their wives are old and fat and they’re resigned to a life of the just happy to be alive mentality.

What they’re happy about I don’t know.

These are men who are shocked to meet someone like me who dares point out that none of this is inevitable, that they can do something about their deteriorated conditions and fading relevance that reinforces their decline.

Unfortunately, no matter how hard I try to get through, many have lived for so long in this depressive and vegetative mindset that no matter what anybody says to them, it’s like a dream that vanishes the second they open their eyes and see that same old world.

It’s like Stockholm Syndrome where they keep going back to what’s familiar.

It bears noting that many older men accept depression as a normal part of aging and life in general, and therefore, cannot fathom a world in its absence.

DATA POINTS

1] As men age, total testosterone levels decline. Free testosterone (testosterone not bound in the blood to sex hormone-binding globulin (SHBG)) levels decline more rapidly than total testosterone. Studies have shown that total testosterone decreases by approximately 30% in healthy men between the ages of 25 and 75. Free testosterone levels decline even more significantly with decreases of approximately 50%. However, only about 1 in 5 men have a total testosterone level that falls below the normal range. Fortunately, many healthy lifestyle choices, such as heavy resistance training and aerobic exercise, quality sleep, and a healthy diet can actually increase testosterone production naturally.

Will Testosterone Replacement Therapy Cure All of the Ailments Associated with Aging?

NO.

Testosterone replacement therapy will not make up for poor diet, lack of exercise, and a generally unhealthy lifestyle. It is not a magic bullet, nor will it reverse aging.

For those with low testosterone, combining proper diet, exercise, good sleep, and other positive lifestyle modifications with testosterone replacement therapy can make you stronger and leaner and feel better.

Of course, it’s kind of a Catch-22, because when your levels are low you’re not motivated to make changes in your lifestyle unless you’re surrounded by people who believe that life doesn’t end at 60.

2] Studies consistently show that high-volume endurance exercises reduces baseline androgen hormones by 20-40 percent. The androgen hormones include testosterone, estrogen, and DHEA.

Endurance exercise leads to larger acute elevations of the key stress hormones cortisol. Excess cortisol has a catabolic effect on muscle tissue, breaking it down and leading to persistent inflammation.

In other words, you can’t put on a tight, round butt when your hormones are flat.

3] Depression as normal.

Feeling sad or emotional is the main symptom of depression. But for many men that isn’t the primary depression symptom. For example, headaches, digestive problems, fatigue, irritability or chronic pain can sometimes indicate depression.

You may not recognize how much your symptoms affect you, or you may not want to admit to yourself or to anyone else that you’re depressed. But ignoring, suppressing or masking depression with unhealthy behavior won’t make it go away.

From my experience, many older men simply accept depression as a normal part of the aging process. Why would being older not make one depressed?

For one thing, you look worse than you did when you were young.

But what many men fail to see is that you don’t have to look like twigs from dried shrubs glued together and then coated in a thin sheet of rubber.

~~~

CONCLUSION

See a primary care physician for a blood test, a psychiatrist for a clinical diagnosis and a personal trainer to keep you out of a nursing home.

Then do what women do and wear that butt with pride.

They’ll thank you for it, trust me.

FROM PERSONAL EXPERIENCE, THESE ARE THE BEST EXERCISES FOR GLUTES

1] Squats

2] Gluteus kickbacks

3] Pelvic tilts

4] Lunges

5] Bridges

6] Deadlifts

7] Step-ups

8] Deep leg presses

You’re welcome.

How to Maintain a Fit, Lean and Strong Physique Without Pharmaceutical Testosterone

crossfit-as-a-master

I know I know…no one can possibly stay in top shape without drugs. Blah blah blah. I’ve heard it a million times … and then some.

Obviously, I’ve heard a lot of bullshit in my life.

With this as background noise, I train at a health club filled with educated and successful older men and women who are in complete denial about anything involving aging.

Their motto is “If I can afford to avoid it, I’m all in.”

What they’re referring to is pharmaceutical grade testosterone, dispensed by a circle of multimillionaire physicians in Houston who know their clientele better than they know themselves, which is not saying much, but whatever. Life’s a food chain and somebody always loses even when they think they’re winning.

These physicians know that vanity is what drives this train, and by pandering to this affliction they acquire “lifers” who are patients until the day they die, which is usually sooner than later.

Death notwithstanding, it’s still a good business decision.

REASONS TO USE

The most common reasons people take these drugs are to acquire [and/or maintain] lean mass, build strength and acquire stamina – without having to beat the living crap out of themselves in the gym. If these are your goals, and side-effects are irrelevant given the fact that you’re only in it for the here and now, drugs are the way to go.

But what happens when a middle-aged man opts out of testosterone supplementation?

Does he fall apart?

Does his sex life automatically fail?

Does depression stomp him to oblivion?

Actually, none of the above.

Note: Some men do suffer from a medical condition known as hypogonadism, which requires treatment, including testosterone supplementation. Conditions known to cause hypogonadism are obesity, diabetes [type 2], liver or kidney disease, hormonal disorders or infections. In such patients, testosterone therapy is recommended. For everyone else, it’s recommended when they have the ability to pay for it.

If you want to stay fit, lean and strong without drugs, you will have to do the following without fail, which includes adjusting your expectations.

Step One:

Medical Evaluation

Have your blood drawn to determine your testosterone levels [Note: You may have to have the test run a couple of times to get a solid baseline].

After the results are in, your physician [if he’s reputable] will tell you whether or not you fall into the “normal” range. If so, he will NOT prescribe testosterone.

This particular step is bypassed altogether by less than scrupulous physicians who simply ask you how you feel.

If you say something along the lines of “I’ve been feeling a bit lethargic lately, or “My sex drive isn’t what it was at 17,” you get a scrip and designer syringe pouch.

Step two:

Hire a personal trainer.

If you’re not a veteran gym rat, you’ll need help getting started. Even if you’ve spent the better part of your life under the iron, you’ll need someone to keep an eye on your form and to motivate you when you get down on yourself for not performing the way you did 30 years ago.

This is what you pay the big bucks for and why it’s worth it no matter how much it is.

Then tell your trainer exactly what your goals are so that he or she can tell you whether or not you’re out of your mind.

This is a crucial first step in any successful relationship as any psychiatrist will corroborate.

My regimen is 5 days on, two off.

Monday-Wednesday-Friday: Strength training weights and cross fit style movements.

I train – with my trainer – for an hour. Then I do stretching, rolling and abs on my own for another 30 minutes.

Tuesday-Thursday: Mixed cardio, stretching, and foam rolling for an hour, total.

Saturday-Sunday: Rest.

So we’re talking about 6 1/2 to 7 hours a week of training. No big deal. Really.

Step Three:

Nutrition.

Eating healthy is a pain in the ass, but the way it makes you look and feel more than make up for what it’s become: Fuel and nothing more. You can allow yourself a few indulgences here and there, but understand that whatever you take in you have to kick out.

Step Four:

Rest and Recovery

As most of us know too well, days off are usually depressing. The reason for this is simple: We don’t feel the highs.

In the absence of endorphin, our bodies feel sluggish.

Some describe it as blood like molasses.

This is normal, but over time you will be able to conquer your withdrawal symptoms, though I’ve yet to do it.

Understand that addiction is what it is for a reason.

Step Five:

Balance

This is one of the most difficult hurdles for anyone in the fitness game because it’s so nebulous.

In layman’s terms, balance means having a life outside of the gym.

Weird, right?

It may involve spending time with family and friends, going to a museum, taking in a sporting event –– anything that doesn’t involve the gym or working out, including discussions about the gym or working out.

Note: Workout addicts find themselves unable to discuss anything that doesn’t involve working out because it’s their only frame of reference, and because discussing it while not actually doing it is better than nothing at all.

SUMMARY

You will never look the way you did at 25, drugs or no drugs. Aging is a natural part of life. While many people think that we should all age backwards, I’ve yet to see anyone accomplish this.

The best we can do is find peace through the combination of acceptance and challenge.

As a Baby Boomer, I have to get real about where I am in life no matter how far outside the two standard deviations I may be.

I am still mortal, and no drugs are going to change it.

I could be leaner, veins spread out like a squid across my fat-depleted arms, abs and chest.

Some have described the look as something out of a Marvel Comic, which is where culture [and reality, in general] is headed within a certain demographic.

Postscript

Some have postulated that Hollywood actors who appear to put on massive amounts of muscle for their movies in a very short amount of time are able to accomplish this through extreme diet and lighting. But i can absolutely, positively assure you that for anyone over the age of 50, putting on that much lean mass while losing weight is impossible without help from your local pharmacy.