‘Dad Bod’ Coming to a Store Near You!

30C0BA1000000578-3425007-image-m-39_1454237321408Mattel’s new ‘Dad Bod’ doll…

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-3425007/Where-s-Dad-Bod-Ken-Twitter-calls-plastic-doll-beer-belly-Mattel-s-curvy-new-Barbie-unveiled.html

One of the many sacrifices we health-oriented older men make is the enjoyment of eating bad things that taste good. 

To us, food is fuel. Nothing more.

I know. Depressing, right?

Not really.

See, the payoff is not looking [and feeling] like a Mattel ‘Dad Bod’ doll.

For those of you who don’t already know, ‘Dad Bod’ is the physical representation of what the typical middle-aged man looks like.

Of course, I don’t know any of these people personally because I live in a big city.

Here, pot bellies constitute Class-A misdemeanors, punishable by hard time at a “wellness” center that specializes in testosterone implants, orals and injectables, coupled with psychiatric counseling for clinical depression.

However, in smaller places where appearance and good health are secondary to gluttony and death in slow motion, being too fit after a certain age is a Class-A felony.

 

The Cure for Existential Angst, Guaranteed.

Three years ago my trainer stitched this together this little as a reminder to me that aging doesn’t always follow a predictable path, that it is possible to slow it all down — including the fading relevance older men often feel when they can no longer throw a baseball without looking like an ex-president during one of those ceremonial first pitches.

Life only wins when you fade, not when you die. j.r.

What’s [really] the Best Workout for Baby Boomers?

5d99a3dfe96d85f1caff06438b6de62456yr Old Crossfit Masters Competitor Ken Greaves

I was scouring the web for inspirational articles covering training regimens for masters athletes – and let me tell you – there aren’t many.

Instead, what I came across this absurd piece written by two 20-year-olds who went on to win a contest for their advice to older men and women.

Here’s a teaser on the topic of cardio: The American College of Sports Medicine recommends working at a level that is “hard enough to raise your heart rate and break a sweat,” but still allows one “to carry on a conversation.” This ensures that the body is being stimulated but not so intensely that there is a risk of overexertion. 

Comment: If I can carry on a conversation while doing cardio, I’m not training. [Note to you 20-year-olds on your Iphones while walking on treadmills].

http://www.bodybuilding.com/fun/best_over_60_workout.htm

Myth #1:

“Because hypertrophy and maximal force production are not likely to be goals for the 60 and up crowd, free weights and muscle specialization will not be necessary.”

Really? Says who?

As a 60-year-old power-lifter and cross-fit enthusiast, I train primarily with free weights because they allow my entire body to participate in the stabilization process. I also focus on certain muscle groups that help protect my body when lifting heavy.

No wonder I don’t have back problems. People who tend to sit on machines all day do. So yes, hypertrophy is a big deal as is maximal force production.

Myth #2:

“While teens may be able to handle three days of lifting per week with seven days of cardio, this is not realistic for older adults.”

I train with weights 3 days a week and incorporate 5 days of cross-fit style cardio. I take the weekends off because i have a life outside the gym.  And by the way, most teens can’t keep up with my workouts.

Myth #3

“Intensity, too is different [for older athletes], as more tender joints and less conditioned lungs and other muscles are potential issues for older adults to consider.”

While joint pain is always making itself known in one area or another, it’s been doing the same thing since college. So I just work around it until it heals.

Myth #4

“While free weights are often favored by serious gym-goers and exercise enthusiasts, machines are preferable for older adults.”

I don’t know anyone my age at my gym who doesn’t use free weights.

Myth #5

“Machine movements do not rely on stabilizing muscles as much, which is important as older adults may be somewhat deconditioned and will not have sufficiently developed muscles for complex free weight exercises.”

It is true that some adults are deconditioned, but for those of us who train regularly, this is simply not applicable.

Myth #6

“At the age of 60, the body is mostly incapable of building large quantities of new muscle.”

This has to be the most ridiculous comment I have ever read.

Myth #7

“The main goal of working out should be to build some strength and reduce the risk for disease (primarily heart disease). Therefore, a workout should simply be to get the blood flowing and to build some strength without causing any serious injury in the process.”

If my trainer ever said this to me, I’d fire him.

Myth #8

“Supplementing protein shakes is unnecessary and pointless. At this age, the body can’t digest and absorb protein easily, which will result in excess bodily waste and weight gain from supplementation.”

I don’t know whether to laugh or cry for this little idiot.

SUMMARY

20-year-olds haven’t a clue about fitness routines for adult athletes, nor do they have any knowledge of our psychological predispositions.

In my gym, I routinely challenge college kids to jump in with me for sets, but so many have suffered injuries that they rarely show up anymore.

🙂

So, what REALLY are the best workouts for baby Boomers?

ANSWER: It’s a rhetorical question.

Why Some Stars Age Badly?

beautiful-stars-who-aged-horribly4Axl Rose, 53

You can blame a crappy appearance on the passage of a few years.

But you can also blame yourself for how you spent them.

In other words, “You make the bed you sleep in…” as my grandfather, Shelley, used to say.

Unfortunately, Axl Rose started out with a bed in complete disarray.

Thankfully, his voice and ability to write memorable music were enough to carry him through a lot of the turmoil.

But he is still a tragic result of his past.

So did misfortune cause him age badly?

Indirectly, yes.

But with help, most of us are salvageable.

In his case, he was either unable – or unwilling – to overcome the demons that laid waste to his childhood, and what we now see is a reflection of how he feels about himself.

There are many talented celebrities who have aged incredibly well.

In every instance, though, it’s because they took great care of themselves –– not because they visited a Devil’s Crossroads or were born divine.

Sting comes to mind as he always does in these narratives.

Aging is not a death sentence in the context of appearance.

It’s a series of choices.

I bring this up because MSN is fond of writing attention-grabbing headlines about how badly some celebrities have aged, like they were somehow struck down by God while shopping at Whole Foods.

Does a 53-year-old man look like he did at 22?

Of course not.

But many would argue that an exemplary 53-year-old actually constitutes an improvement.

A few lines, harder features, a fit frame, success, maturity, wisdom, knowledge all combined can equal a far more appealing individual.

While youth and beauty are synonymous in absolute terms, aging well balances the scales because it is one of life’s consummate achievements.

Just ask anyone who’s ever won an Oscar.

BULLET POINTS

Aging badly is most often tied to two things:

1] Obesity

2] Over-indulgence in plastic surgery.

Both are tied directly to self-esteem, and both are treatable psychiatric disabilities.

There is a third possibility, but delusion doesn’t count.

Is Izabel Goulart the Preferred Female Physique of the Successful Older Man?

2CCE3C4200000578-0-image-m-98_1443325278792

Victoria’s Secret model, Izabel Goulart, 30, 5’9,” 117 lbs.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-3250622/Supermodel-Izabel-Goulart-puts-cheeky-display-tiny-bikini-frolics-beach-Rio-Janeiro.html

Disclaimer: What older men claim to prefer in terms of physical proportion in women –– and what they actually crave behind closed door are often two entirely different things.

This aside, according to the vast – and I mean VAST – majority of affluent older men I happen to know, the preference is “skinny and proportionate” like Ms. Goulart [above].

In fact, this look has become so ingrained in this upper echelon demographic that every woman exhibits symptoms of an eating disorder.

But why exactly do such men choose skinny women over what every poll ever conducted in the history of mankind has indicted: a preference for curves?

Top 6 Reasons:

#1] They’re “safe.”

Skinny is the safe choice. No one will put you down for choosing a thin woman.

The are no “saddlebags” references or related vitriol likely to embarrass and man who wants the world to see his conquest on an existential plane.

#2] Easy to physically maneuver, mostly in bed.

Fem-bigot-ageist narrative suggests that men prefer skinny women because they are easier to physically dominate.

While this is certainly true, one must also understand that older men are less inclined to make sex a full-on workout, so the more a woman can do the better.

#3] The smaller they are, the bigger “you” are.

As every man who sleeps with women knows, the bigger they are the smaller “you” look.

Conversely, the smaller they are, the more you resemble a porn star.

I’ve heard men say that a drop in just 10 pounds can add a full inch in both length and girth.

On a related note, men report that with skinny women they can penetrate deeper because there are no “fat ass cheeks or thighs to work around.”

And while I have little experience in this regard, it does make sense from the standpoint of basic physics.

#4] Look great in designer apparel, or anything else for that matter. 

As one man put it, “I have dated a few tall skinny model types, and there is absolutely a feeling of “Winning” with one by your side. I have precious little use for social standing at this point in my life but it is a nice, unique perk.”

Such women are born and bred for fashion, which is why they go to Gucci instead of Target.

Their commodity value hinges on their ability to morph into whatever a man of the world envisions his mate to look like, particularly in public.

And because their frames of reference are all the same, their women tend to resemble one another.

#5] Good future prospects of maintaining desirable weight.

Like any investment, men are looking at all aspects of an acquisition, longevity being one of them.

If he builds a house today, will it be just as attractive 20 years from now?

So while “curvy” women may be fun for many in the bedroom, skinnier ones hold up better for long-term relationships and/or marriage

#6] They just look smarter and more sophisticated. 

While superior intelligence has no basis in truth, skinny women just look smarter.

They certainly understand affluent older men.

Of course, the same applies to prostitutes.

Aging is a Bitter Pill [No Wonder We’re All in Denial]

Liam-Neeson-MAINLiam Neeson, 63 ‘Never been healthier…’ for 63.

Ahead of turning 63 on June , he said: ‘My birthday is a touchy subject. I’m going to be 63 — nobody wants to be 63! I’m getting old. 

‘What I want more than anything is for it to be ignored. I just hate it and it makes me feel vulnerable. It’s such a private thing — the day you were born, the day you came out of your mother’s womb.

‘Some people hire a boat and do grand things like that, but I just get embarrassed about that sort of celebration and attention.’

~~~

What exactly is 63 supposed to look like?

Does anyone know?

As far as Hollywood is concerned, a 63-year-old actor is supposed to be fit, muscular, dashing…and yes, sexy.

A lot of this is projection, as many industry people are themselves middle age…and beyond.

But in the end it just gets down to pandering to a massive Baby Boomer market in denial.

This aside, how do a very select few 63-year-old men manage to maintain extraordinary levels of youthfulness?

1] Intense physical fitness regimens

2] Balanced diets

3] Low stress

4] Regular testosterone injections

5] Plastic surgery

6] Perfect styling

7] Flattering light

8] A willing suspension of disbelief on the part of audiences

9] Money and power

10] Dying famous at age 27.

~~~

Nobody wins this war.

We can be in spectacular shape at 63, but we’re still 63 no matter how imaginatively anyone spins it.

This is a particularly tough pill to swallow for older men of health and means.

They can afford to travel, dine at 5-star establishments, buy expensive toys, and date beautiful young men and women.

But the problem is that they have very little time to do it before the other show drops.

Think older man’s version of Ferris Bueller’s Day Off for adults and this begins to make sense.

This is why denial is my generation’s crucible.

Does “Low T” Cause Depression [or is aging a nightmare no matter how you look at it?]

depressedmanistock

Testosterone is the male sex hormone responsible for the development of many ‘masculine’ traits.

It encourages fat loss and muscle development, as well as sex drive, aggression, and energy levels.

In other words, the more testosterone, the more “Alpha.”

“Low T” has the opposite effect: Use your imagination. It’s bad.

Numerous health problems, including depression are heavily linked.

~~~

However, the relationship between depression and testosterone is very confusing because they are very similar.

If your “T” levels are low you’ll will suffer low energy, zero sex drive, crappy mood, endless irritability and difficulty sleeping – all of which characterize depression.

Some guys I know attack the problem with hormone replacement therapy.

In fact, most do…with varying degrees of success.

It cheaper than psychotherapy, and with faster results.

Nonetheless, “Low T” is not always the cause of depression, though it might be responsible.

For men who aren’t depressed and have lots of time and money on their hands, increasing testosterone might be an effective way to boost mood to even higher levels, improving drive, libido and motivation.

There’s always a higher high, after all.

But like other indulgences, it can become a one way street.

In other words, once you start, there’s no going back because eventually, the body stops producing it, not that you give a crap.

Most older men don’t care about anything but now, because there isn’t anything else.

Oh God, am I depressed?

~~~

CLEARING UP THE CONFUSION

If you’re depressed but don’t know why, you might start by asking yourself why someone with so much feels like he has so little?

This is a therapy question, by the way.

On the other hand, if you also have difficulty gaining muscle, losing fat, keeping your blood pressure in check, or losing your ‘morning glory,’ “Low T” may be the culprit.

Three other factors may play a role in depression:

1] Vegetarian diets low in protein.

2] Dark offices low in sunlight.

3] Physical inactivity.

~~~

Okay, so let’s say you aren’t a fan of hormone replacement therapy, and want a natural way to achieve similar results.

Exercise – Compound movements, like squats and bench press, and HIIT (high intensity interval training).

Sleep – This is where your testosterone is produced and why rest and recovery are so important. Make sleep a priority in your life. Keep your room dark and cool, and avoid caffeine before bed.

Vitamin D – Vitamin D is responsible for helping your body to regulate numerous other hormonal processes. The easiest way to get it is sunlight. If there is no sunlight where you live – or you’re stuck in an office for 12 hours a day –  supplement. It’s no surprise that all those existentialists came from countries bereft of sunlight.

Magnesium and Zinc – Magnesium and zinc support healthy testosterone production and prevent testosterone from being converted into zinc. You can Google it.

Saturated Fat – As shocking as this may sound, the most important ingredient in terms of your diet is saturated fat. It’s no longer believed to cause heart problems, but it will increase your levels of good ‘HDL’ cholesterol, which also happens to be what your body uses to make testosterone and other sex hormones. Try a glass or two of full fat milk if your stomach can handle it. It might improve your mood.

Protein – Protein is the building block of muscle. Now you know why vegetarians look like crap. Protein produces anabolic hormones [like testosterone] that encourage muscle growth, among other benefits.

ONE VARIANT

Avoid Plastic – Random, perhaps, research on ‘xenoestrogens’ isn’t pretty. These are substances act like estrogen in the body and significantly lower testosterone.

Along with our more sedentary and indoor lifestyles, this is thought to be one of the big reasons that men today have lower testosterone on average.

To avoid xenoestrogens, don’t eat out of plastic containers, and definitely don’t microwave anything in plastic.

ON A FINAL NOTE

The Stones famously lamented “it’s a drag getting old,” and it’s no surprise that Baby Boomer do struggle with aging more than the generation preceding it.

Boomers — those born between 1946 and 1964 — are the generation most likely to report being in treatment for depression, at 14 percent, according to the Gallup-Healthways Well-Being Index. That compares to 11 percent among Generation X (born 1965-1979), “traditionalists” born before 1945, and Millennials (born 1980-1996).

This makes complete sense to me because Traditionalists lived their lives in throes of World Wars and Millennials aren’t old enough to feel their age.

Note: Baby Boomers are more likely to have been diagnosed with depression (21 percent) than any other generation (Gen X: 18 percent, Millennials: 16 percent, traditionalists: 15 percent).

This aside, Boomers are also more open to discussing their mental health issues than older Americans who refused to admit to having any psychiatric problems at all – a key reason Boomers need therapy in the first place.

14 Foods to Kick to the Curb [along with the tire around your waist]

whitebread

Occasionally I run across a health-related article that’s both accurate and easy-to-read.

The following is from Men’s Fitness and covers the generalities without killing you with fine print.

The only problem is that you’ll have to sit through a ton of ads every 2 minutes to complete it, so I’ll save you the aggravation:

http://www.mensfitness.com/nutrition/what-to-eat/14-foods-to-kick-out-of-the-kitchen-forever

~~~

Most Boomers I know stopped eating most of the following foods because they are hypochondriacs like me, and therefore, spend an inordinate amount of time balancing health with destiny.

They read, they get annual physicals, and go to the gym regularly like other normal middle-aged people who live in large urban settings.

No wonder urbanites who occasionally visit a WalMart for a last minute gift for a 6-year-old post “people” pictures to Pinterest of creatures who could well be descendants of another species.

Okay, for the list:

1] White or “multi-grain” bread

When I was a kid growing up in New Orleans, french bread was a staple.

We’d toast it with butter and call it a meal.

Of course, were were kids and pretty much immune to anything we ate, unless the only thing we ate was crap, in which case we were also screwed.

These days, life is not as forgiving.

Everything we consume comes with ten times the impact.

For example, white bread contains zero while grains for cardiovascular protection, and spike blood sugar levels. [see white rice].

Leave it on the shelf or get a leather bound insulin container with your initials embossed on it.

2] Ready-to-eat breakfast cereal

“Healthy” is a term manufacturers use to sell products.

Understand that 4 grams of sugar on a label equates to 1 teaspoon of added sugar in reality.

It’s up to you to read.

3] Fat free pretsels

Pretzels are full of basically nothing, so consuming an entire bag in a single sitting is not uncommon.

Try 49 pistachios, instead.

They’re packed with nutrients, so eating 49 of them equates to half the bag of pretzels.

Of course, if you can limit yourself to a few pretzels, no harm no foul.

But good luck with that.

4] White rice

Stripped of nutrients, fiber and antioxidants, white rice does nothing but spike blood sugar and insulin, leading to fat storage.

There is no upside for white rice unless you’re about to perform wind sprints on an empty stomach.

5] Generic peanut butter

If it’s not absolutely, positively natural, there are usually trans fats in peanut butter.
Even if the label says ‘zero trans fats,’ if it’s fully hydrogenated, there can still be 0.5 grams of trans fats.
Try the natural alternative.
It’s more expensive, but far less expensive in long-term medical bills.

6] Trail mix

Who doesn’t grab a bag of trail mix before hitting the road or airways?

It looks like the healthiest snack on the planet.

It isn’t, particularly if it has chunks of chocolate and dried fruit, which are sky-high in sugar.

A better alternative is to make it yourself, and store it for your next outing.

7] Canned corn

What the hell is canned corn?

I remember eating it as a kid, but like I said, “as a kid.”

No sane adult eats canned corn because they know it has enough starch to choke a pig.

Try green beans if you have to eat something out of a can.

8] Plain pasta sauce in a jar

The great thing about canned pasta sauce is that it usually has lots of prostate-healthy lycopene.

But it also has enough salt to drive your blood pressure through the roof.

Marinara sauce is a better choice.

9] White pasta

Like anything else you est that’s white, it’s stripped of everything, including fiber and bran.

Try whole-wheat pasta, quinoa, black or brown rice and whole grain couscous.

10] Canned soup

Think 800 grams of sodium and this should put an end to the discussion.

Try a low-sodium alternative.

11] Traditional beef jerky

Pretty much any food product you buy in a convenience store is guaranteed to kill you prematurely.

It’s cheap, over-processed and bereft of any nutritional value.

Your best bet is to fork over the money and buy healthy beef jerky at 10 times the price, but 1000 times the nutritional benefits.

12] Cereal bars

A 4-oz cereal bar can contain up to 30g of sugar.
Try hearty bars with ingredients you can clearly see.

13] Powdered coffee creamer

If you use coffee creamer, I’m sorry.

What you’re putting into your body is empty calories, fat, sugar, and salt.

This is idiotic.

Just drink it black until you can locate some actual milk.

14] Movie theater-style popcorn

It’s full of trans fats and loaded with butter.
Try air-popped popcorn and enjoy a snack filled with a healthy dose of fiber.

~~~

Look, eating healthy is not that difficult, but it can be a pain in the ass for those of you not used to reading – or caring about – labels.

Just remember, life doesn’t care about you.

You have to care about you for life will pay you back.

Clear and Present Signs of Exercise Addiction in Older Men [and women]

7426221296740dd81180z

I know a few older men [and women] who would rather die than miss a workout.

This is because missing a workout is worse than death.

http://breakingmuscle.com/sports-psychology/are-you-addicted-to-exercise-the-tell-tale-signs

~~~

There are quite a few exercise-addicted older men with whom I share a gym acquaintance.

It could be argued that I myself am an exercise addict to the extent that I train 6 days a week for 1 hour, sometimes 2, rather than 5 or 6!, which is not uncommon to many.

Most of the men in question are single – always single – principally because there is no room for anything – or anyone – else.

Even pets.

Exercise releases endorphins and the hormone Serotonin, which one tends to get used to – or addicted to – as the case may be.

Eventually the highs take over one’s life and everything else becomes meaningless.

Just ask anyone at AA what it feels like not to have drugs at their disposal.

~~~

John [not his real name] is 58 years of age and prides himself on his ability to run 5 miles before hitting the gym, where he performs hand stand push-ups and double-under jumping jacks to the amazement of everyone around him.

In this sense, he’s his own circus act.

His thin, muscular frame, and gymnastic abilities, earn him the respect and admiration of his peers, which is all he needs to side-step existential pain.

For a little while he can forget about his aging wife, his kids, his financial obligations.

In essence, he becomes someone else.

But eventually he has to go back to the “other” reality.

For some the transition is seamless.

For others, it’s like that classic Twilight Zone episode where the old woman lives through television re-runs of herself as a beautiful young actress, imagining that nothing has changed.

A married man with a family doesn’t have that luxury.

Now visualize a single man with time on his hands, and exercise addiction become a full-blown psychosis.

No wonder I see the same anorexics, bulimics and exercise addicts appear at my gym day after day, year after year; until one day they show up on crutches after a hip replacement – or just disappear altogether.

When people inquire as to their whereabouts, the refrain is always the same:

“They died doing what they loved.”

I guess one could say the same of heroin addicts.

Every addict has an excuse for dying, though they don’t couch it that way.

In the end, there is a razor thin line between exceptional fitness and clinical addiction.

ARE YOU AN EXERCISE ADDICT?

Seven factors are assessed and it’s something for you fitness junkies to consider:

Tolerance: Do you need more and more to achieve the same effects?

Withdrawal: Do you experience increased agitation, fatigue, and tension if you don’t exercise?

Intention Effect: Do you exercise for longer than intended on most trips to the gym?

Lack of Control: Do you have difficulty scaling back the duration and intensity of exercise?

TimeSpent: Do you spend huge amounts of time on fitness related activities?

Reduction of Other Pursuits: Is exercising too much affecting other parts of your life? (social, work, relationships)?

Continuance Despite Injury: Do you train even when you are injured?

Final Notes:

It’s been my experience that all exercise addicts my age would answer yes to all of the above.

Adding fuel to the fire, they “supplement” their fitness regimes with testosterone injections, HGH and anabolic steroids when the effects of aging begin to present.

This helps perpetuate the cycle long after nature fails them.

But longevity isn’t the name of the game in this world.

Escape is.

~~~

A few highlights from the article that all of us who have, at one time or another, crossed the line into exercise addiction know well:

1] We are often sick, injured or depressed.

2] We define our happiness by our bodies and level of fitness.

3] Our relationships suffer [or don’t exist at all]

4] We train like pros, but aren’t [so why?]

Training in proper measure is one of life’s most rewarding [and sensible] choices.

It’s not easy, and it does require major adjustments in lifestyle habits, but it must be balanced against everything else in life.

From personal experience, I can attest to the fact that if you don’t keep an eye on BALANCE, your life will get smaller and smaller and smaller until it’s just you and a bunch of codependent addicts enabling the cycle of addiction as the world passes you by.

Then again, if you can afford to run down the clock without having to worry about friends, family, spouses [or even a dog], we’ll all just do what we always do, which is use you as examples of what exercise addiction looks like, and why therapy is a better alternative.

Soon Everyone Will Have Steroids with Their Morning Coffee

11698757_10206732604932269_178748352740934489_o

#Dailymail ran an article a couple of years ago that stated “up to 20% of Hollywood’s leading men use PED’s [performance enhancing drugs].

Check it out for yourself:

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2400714/How-Hollywood-stars-rely-steroids-buff-bodies-Up-20-percent-leading-men-using-PEDs-claims-new-report.html

But as everyone who works out regularly knows, the number is more like 90%, with the remaining 10% losing out to actors with “better hairlines,” which would be irrelevant had they taken the damn drugs.

Articles and website abound touting the merits of “hard work and diet” in achieving a preternatural physique.

“Yes, even you Mr. 60-year-old can look better than you did back in college with the right lifestyle choices!”

Total bullshit.

I guess no one bothered to mention the fact that eternal and youth aren’t synonymous under any circumstances.

However, if a man wants to look like the two guys in the above photograph who are well over 60 [source: Facebook’s “fitmenover50” page], steroids are the only way to achieve it.

I know you don’t want to hear this.

I also know you resent having to use facial fillers, take 300 vitamins every morning to supplement whatever time is stealing in your sleep, and avoiding anything that tastes good.

This is life in the absence of steroids.

You want a perfect physique?

You want to have a slice of pizza from time to time?

You want to train at half the intensity, half the time?

You have to take the drugs!

If not, join the mortal brigade and feel good about the fact that it’s all you.

But you won’t find yourself landing on these pages…

https://www.facebook.com/fitguysover50

See, in order to get press, you have to be extraordinary.

But in the the context of fitness, extraordinary isn’t enough unless you look extraordinary, which no one who undergoes regular drug tests can achieve.

Am I getting through here?

All these self-righteous pricks who tell you they have all the dense muscle and low bodyfat by the grace of god are completely full of shit – or steroids, as the case may be.

Thick, sculpted muscle fiber combined with extremely low bodyfat on a “fit over 50” man is the very definition of S T E R O I D S.

Hell, it’s tough for a 25-year-old guy to build that kind of physique.

The reason for that is that IT’S NOT HUMANLY POSSIBLE WITHOUT DRUGS!

EVERY SINGLE SOLITARY BODYBUILDER I HAVE EVER KNOWN AND/OR PHOTOGRAPHED WAS A STEROID JUNKIE, MOST OF THEM IN DENIAL.

Puhleeze!

Like we’re idiots?

Since when did mankind evolve into super beings that don’t even remotely resemble anatomy charts?

The only “human anatomies” people reference these days can be found in department stores that sell Under Armour apparel, which uses flawlessly sculpted “giants” to sell their products.

But they are M A N N E Q U I N S!

117927560

And while some elite, and ridiculously genetically blessed, professional athletes look a lot like this, it doesn’t last long.

In the context of things human, it’s a way to sell clothing, websites…press, in general.

As we’ve all come to learn, reality is a buzzkill.

So we’ve replaced it with something more interesting – no matter what the side-effects, both physically and psychologically.

But hey, ya’ only live once, so why not?

Better to burn out than fade away.

Note: Lest you think that men are the sole users of steroids, check this out:

http://www.oddee.com/item_99125.aspx

For those of you who are interested, the following article highlights the most popular steroids among older men:

http://www.mensfitness.co.uk/nutrition/supplements/1106/steroids-sale

On a final note, there’s the Anderson Cooper story, which has caught fire like everything else that involves cheating fate:

http://ac360.blogs.cnn.com/2013/02/07/74-year-old-defies-time-with-hormones/

But as one commenter stated: “At 65+ you’re looking at balancing the improved quality of life with HGH vs a longer life with less quality.”

This is becoming a mantra that pretty much says it all.

Throw the bones.