10 Comments Older Athletes Most Often Hear from Non-Athletes

As every older athlete knows, non-athletes are masters of projection.

Whatever they’d like to be doing – but can’t – they pretend is some sort of psychiatric disability in others.

With this in mind, here are 10 of the most often heard comments from older, non-athletic gym members.

I will dissect each of them in turn…

#1] Don’t overdo it!

Translation: I hope you sprain your knee doing all that stuff I wish i could do – or felt inclined, inspired or otherwise not too lazy to do – so I’d fell better about not doing it.

#2] You’re going to hurt your back doing all that weight!

Translation: I hurt my back working in the garden, so I’ll be damned if you get to lift 400 pounds without at least a strained tendon.

#3] You’re not 20 anymore!

Translation: I’m not 20 anymore and man do I feel it. So hell no! You’re not going to feel one bit younger then me!

#4] Are you trying to win a bodybuilding contest?

Translation: I resemble a human leviathan, so no, you don’t get to make me look and feel irrelevant!

#5] Doesn’t all that weight bother your joints?

Translation: I can’t get out of bed without bottle of Advil, so how can you possibly lift that much weight without swallowing two?

#6] Are you taking steroids?

Translation: Because I look like crap, he should look like crap. And if he doesn’t, it’s because he’s taking steroids, which doesn’t count.

#7] You’re my hero! [Back-handed compliment].

Translation: This is back-handed compliment that is both self-deprecating and dismissive. Sure, I’d like to look like that, but what ‘lunatic’ puts in that much effort without some psychiatric disability?

#8] Where do you get the energy to workout like that?

Translation: I have no energy to speak of, so why [or how] does he? This is also a way of putting me in my place through subtle innuendo that he knows I am, in fact, no longer 20.

#9] I know a man who ended up in the morgue doing that.

Translation: I’m afraid to anything physical anymore as I fear death more than I fear doing the things that I love. So basically, I’m already dead.

#10] Are you trying to live forever?

Translation: What difference does it make whether or not I work out? We’re all going to die. Of course, living better always trumps living longer, so there’s that.

~~~

FINAL THOUGHTS/SUGGESTIONS

There is no question that we Baby Boomers can no longer train the way we did at 20.

But this does not mean we can’t kick the average 20-year-old to the curb in the gym.

In order to do this, we must train smart.

If you can afford it, hire a qualified personal trainer with a degree in Kinesiology.

That’s what I did and it’s why I’m where I am today.

Your trainer can also offer tips on nutrition, and help keep you motivated.

The most common reason I hear from older men as to why they don’t hire a personal trainer is that they don’t want to commit to a certain time to train everyday.

Translation: I don’t really want to put myself through all this crap. Who am I kidding?

When you Hit Your 60’s, You Have to be Tough, Tough, Tough, Tough, Tough, Tough, Tough…

Researchers at University College London found a direct link between major health problems like heart disease, strokes and diabetes, and the amount of exercise done.

Those who regularly undertook moderate or vigorous physical activity at least once a week were much more likely to be “healthy agers” than those who remained inactive.

People who became physically active during the eight-year monitoring period were three times more likely to be healthy agers than those who remained inactive.

And those who engaged in regular physical activity for the whole eight years were seven times more likely to be healthy than those who did no exercise.

The authors wrote: “Sustained physical activity was prospectively associated with improved healthy ageing – absence of disease, freedom from disability, high cognitive and physical functioning, good mental health.

“Significant health benefits were even seen among participants who became physically active relatively late in life.

“The results support public health initiatives designed to engage older adults in physical activity.”

………………

This week in the gym was a tough one for me.

I officially entered my 60’s last week and I didn’t take it well.

We stayed home, cooked, huddled together with the dogs and cats and waited for the 24 hour period to pass.

This was not the me I used to know.

That person would raise a middle finger to the wind and pull a gym PR.

This time it was different.

I felt depressed, vulnerable and perilously introspective.

Some call it rumination, a synonym for clinical depression in my book.

Instead of getting over it, I tried to walk through it.

The first day in the gym I suffered a nose bleed in the middle of my dead-lifts.

That blew my day because the bleeding wouldn’t stop.

The next day in the gym I suffered a a bout of hypoglycemia, which made me nauseous, forcing me to leave the gym to eat.

Then I started feeling these out of body experiences, coupled with extreme fatigue.

Yep, I was officially old and falling apart.

Life had it talons in me and I was completely and utterly fucked.

So I called my therapist who then told me that what I was experiencing was a late stage midlife crisis.

I’m beyond midlife by 15 years.

I think of it now as a late 3rd quarter reckoning.

I needed more facts to get through this, but I needed more hardcore facts to get through this so I called my Internist.

Blood work good. Arteries clear.

So what the hell was it?

I booked a 90 minute massage, talked to my girlfriend [who assumed I was losing my mind], then finally had a heart-to-heart with myself.

My nosebleed was caused by a strong anti-inflammatory that I happened to take the morning of a tough workout. Not advisable according to my physician it thins the blood, which can lead to nosebleeds under the pressure of heavy weights.

Note to self: If you want to take this drug, do so after a workout when blood pressure isn’t through the roof [with 450 pounds or more in my hands].

Done. No more nosebleeds.

Blood glucose levels fall when people like me don’t eat enough.

Was I not eating enough?

Not even close.

Subconsciously I have been cutting calories because I prefer to be extremely lean.

But it’s impossible to achieve the look I would like without the help of anabolic steroids, which I don’t take.

So I started concentrating on eating more, eating better, fueling my body in a very conscious and proactive way.

Suddenly, no more blood sugar crashes, fatigue gone, and I felt like myself again.

Funny how that works.

I bring all this up because a lot of things happen below the surface in men like me who feel like adolescents in the bodies of older men.

We’re forced to grow up again and again.

And that’s okay because constant maturity has never been a strong-suit of mine, and reality checks are just part of what keeps me going.

As most people know at this stage of the game, denial is the mother of misery.

Wealthy Men Claim Cheating Makes Them Better Lovers

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-4026718/Group-wealthy-men-claim-CHEATING-spouses-attractive-sugar-babies-attentive-husbands.html

This is a mostly ridiculous piece of filler tripe that panders to the free love narrative.

“It’s all good as long as you come home at night…at some point.”

This is crap.

Relationships are usually tugs of wars that, in the end, are far more fulfilling than they are anything else.

This is a good thing.

People who get bored with their spouses and decide that the best remedy is an affair are digressing back to the model of eroticism being the pinnacle of sexual achievement.

It is not anymore than a bump of heroin is the pinnacle of responsible decision making while in the throes of a depressive episode.

Men who take lovers – and vice versa – are escaping the hard work of relationship building, and they do take work like anything else worthwhile in life.

Short cuts always implode no matter how good the sex happened to be.

And while that memory may awaken something in an otherwise dormant relationship, it’s just the fantasy talking.

No one is better in bed, just more enthusiastic courtesy of a fleeting encounter.

And if anyone thinks their significant other doesn’t question the sudden change in mood, they’re delusional.

In short, affairs do nothing but bleed the life out of relationships no matter what your dick has to say about it.

Sir Mick Does It…Again

http://www.mirror.co.uk/3am/celebrity-news/mick-jaggers-very-unconventional-love-9419607

Mick Jagger, 73, is now on his 8th child with 29-year-old ballerina Melanie Hamrick.

As you might imagine, people have lots to say about this, mostly negative.

“He’s too old to have a child.”

“Their 44-year age difference is outrageous.”

“She’s a gold-digger.”

“He’s a lech.”

“The whole situation is perverted.”

It’s very easy to criticize people for their unconventional lifestyles.

But last time I checked, nobody put a bullet to Melanie’s head, and I’m sure the children will do just fine…

Can a 61-Year-Old Man Get Big and Ripped Without STEROIDS?

JK Simmons, 61. Yea I know. It’s tough to recognize him.

This is the guy you’re probably familiar with, a bit younger, and before all the steroids. Still very fit, but not totally insane!

~~~

So what in god’s name does JK Simmons eat for breakfast? Steroids.

What does JK Simmons eat for lunch? Steroids.

What does JK Simmons eat for dinner? Steroids.

And in case you’re wondering what in the hell JK Simmons is getting so jacked for, apparently it’s for his new “Justice League” role.

~~~

Most of you are familiar with the concept of reincarnation, but at my gym, it’s taken quite literally for good reason.

Average guys you’ve seen around the gym for years – decades in some cases – suddenly reappear, almost unrecognizable, with muscle chiseled like Italian marble, and attitudes to match.

No longer are they just some office guy with a wife, two children and a chronic headache.

Now they’re a Marvel Comics character, performing enormous feats of strength overnight, while shedding bodyfat and building huge mass at the same time.

How does this happen? How does such tremendous transformation in size and attitude occur at such an alarming rate?

How do you think?

How does a distance athlete, for example, maintain so much mass and leanness burning tens of thousands of calories a week — without any strength training?!?

S T E R O I D S

There is NO OTHER WAY to accomplish this feat of preternatural transformation without help from big pharma.

Am I knocking steroid use? Hell no. I’m just calling bullshit on those who refuse to admit the obvious.

Older men of means, and particularly the more vain among us, do not wish to fade out slowly.

They want to run hard, play hard, and look good at any and all cost – cost being the operative word because nothing in life is free, and I’m not talking about the cost of medication.

~~~

What’s fueling all of this is a loophole in the medical industry that allows physicians to deal steroids under the auspices of hormone replacement therapy.

It’s been going on for many, many years, and finally, the advertising has paid off.

Now any Internist with an average practice can become a multi-millionaire dealing testosterone, HGH and a litany of other related drugs to affluent older patients who want another shot at youth.

This is considered normal in many circles, mine included.

~~~

I bring all this up because most everything you ever read on the Internet about older men achieving these super-human physiques through hard training, diet and rest is absurd.

This doesn’t mean you can’t be fit and strong at 60.

What it does mean, however, is that without drugs, you’ll have to lower the baseline if you’re interested in getting anywhere close to reality without blowing your brains over a goal no human can otherwise achieve.

~~~

PHYSICIANS CATCH ON TO THE GRAVY TRAIN

I remember just a few years ago when money started drying up for physicians that alternative income sources started popping up all over town.

Most of them were Botox and Juvederm parties where Internists, for example, would invite 100 of their friends over for injections over cocktails at $500 a pop.

If the parties were big enough, they would offer greater discounts.

This went on for a while until a new breed of doctors started offering testosterone to their patients with “low-testosterone.”

The market for testosterone was ten times more lucrative because it required weekly injections, rather than injections once every two years.

Making things even better for them is the fact that patients don’t have to take blood tests, just have a conversation with the physician about how you don’t feel at 60 the way you did at 25.

Slam dunk.

Anorexia the Height of Achievement to Women of Means [and the go-to look for the affluent older men in their lives]

Alexa Chung, 34.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-3955356/Disturbing-rise-child-women-ve-seen-Alexa-Amal-waif-like-young-girl-look-VIP-achieve-price-health-copycat-fans.html

At my health club, there is a certain go-to look among the women of affluence: “Long, lean, timeless and elegant” is the way its described.

Bulky, curvy and/or overly muscled women are considered low class.

It’s a look relegated to strippers, sugar babies, and prostitutes for the most part.

But it can also include tattoo artists, bartenders, figure models, and “convention” girls hired to showcase things like expensive automobiles.

Thus, an incredibly thin body has become the new way to signal wealth and distinguish oneself from the masses.

“I’m successful, intelligent and at the top of my game…”

FACTOID

Alexa Chung Amal Clooney look so under-developed that, in some cases, critics say they appear pre-pubescent.

Some stars appear to have waists the same sizes as catwalk models, many of whom measure 24in — the same as an eight-year-old child.

BACK NOISE

Achieving this look suggests an abundance of leisure time, which is also important element in this equation, reinforcing the overall narrative.

One must spend hours honing their physiques at the gym, and “the income to maintain a fantastically expensive diet and exercise regime.”

Of course, pressure from outside sources as well as from their own personal relationships play a part.

PERSONAL EXPERIENCE

Many affluent older men I happen to know personally prefer this look in their women.

They see it as intelligent, sophisticated and timeless…kind of the way they see themselves.

The women, therefore, are reflections of their narcissistic projection.

A businessman wants to introduce a Stepford Wife to his colleagues because of what it conveys.

After all, no one could possibly suggest that she didn’t care about her appearance, or that she was unhappy at home…or depressed.

In fact, quite the opposite.

When a man introduces a woman who is curvy or in any way carrying extra baggage, the take-away is that he is less successful, less powerful.

Further to this is simple physics.

Smaller women are also easier to control in bed, thus reinforcing the man’s power and influence. As men age, they are less agile, which emaciation on the part of the partner mitigates.

And finally, there is the “pre-pubescent” thing.

I hate to dwell here, but in my view, many of these men secretly harbor a fetish for little girls. It’s kind of like statutory rape, only legal.

Seriously, why else would grown men prefer sleeping with someone who resembles a 12-year-old child?

How to Distinguish Steroid Users from Mortals

If you’re a in the 45-65 demographic and spend a lot of your time in the gym, you will have noticed a proliferation of unbelievably shredded, ripped and insanely muscled guys.

There a reason for that, and spending time in the gym is only part of the story.

…………….

At 60, I’m smack in the middle of the Baby Boom.

I’m also very athletic, having spent most of my life practicing good nutrition, getting adequate rest, and going to the gym regularly.

But like I said, I’m 60, not 25.

More specifically, my body does not respond to movement and force the way it once did.

Does this mean I can no longer compete in sports, or that I look like crap?

No.

I still hold the USAPL title for the masters dead-lift at this writing.

But things do change.

I have to work harder to keep my belly fat in check. And while I’m still lean and muscular, I’m not shredded and cut.

Then there’s the whole energy thing, as in I don’t have as much of it as I once did.

I need more reset time, more recovery.

So what happens if i decide one day that I want to do triathlons, but still maintain muscle mass and strength? And while I’m at it that I also want a chiseled midsection and striated arms and legs?

Now I’ve got a problem because I no longer have the testosterone levels necessary to achieve all of that at the same time.

So like many men my age [myself excluded], there are scores of “wellness” clinics all over time where men can get prescriptions for “bio-identical” testosterone including a wide array of other “supplements.”.

Now I can run 5 miles a day, swim for an hour and do 3 hours on an exercise bike, while at the same time maintain mass.

See how this works?

You can have everything, be everything.

Of course, that’s not exactly the way it works because life on this highway is a bitch because you have to pay dearly to play.

………………

Without getting into all of the internal side-effects of the drugs, I’ll just focus on the things we can see:

1] The infamous ”big gut” or distended stomach.

A lot of steroid users look fat in spite of the fact that their bodyfat percentages are surprisingly low.

What causes the big guts is usually a combination of bother steroids and HGH [human growth hormone].

If someone uses HGH and/or insulin, you can be pretty damn sure that person is also on steroids … and god knows what else.

2] Disproportionate development of upper body muscles

A steroid user’s upper body muscles (traps, shoulders, neck, pecs, back and especially lats) are often disproportionately large compared to his lower body musculature.

This is due to the fact that upper body muscles have more androgen receptors than other muscles that respond better to resistance training.

This is also why new steroid users see their shoulder, traps and back explode like atomic bombs in the first few steroid cycles.

Of course, leg and torso muscles grow as well but never as fast.

This is what causes the ”V-shape” in roid users who normally wouldn’t otherwise have the genetics to produce such a wide shoulder/thin waist proportionality.

Exceptions:

1] Some of us are born with incredibly good genetics, but there’s a difference between good genes and something preternatural, particularly in older men.

2] Some people only train upper body and never do legs, but again, it never, ever looks like steroids are the culprit. Those of us who are in the gym regularly know the difference, believe me.

3) Gynecomastia or Bitch Tits

What looks like the growth of female breasts in the below picture is due to the exogenous testosterone (from anabolic steroids) entering the body and converting to estrogen, estradiol through a process called aromatization, thanks to the enzyme aromatase.

4) Skin problems caused by steroid use

Levels of hormones such as testosterone play a significant role in sebaceous glands and potentially can cause acne outbursts, especially on the back.

Although many professional pretend to have it all figured out, acne is now well understood yet but it is well accepted that testosterone plays a role.

4a] Stretch marks

Stretch marks are not a direct side effect of steroid use.

During the first few steroid cycles and user goes through, diet and sleep staying in check, the user will experience explosive muscle growth.

Thus, the skin may not adapt quickly enough to this change, and therefore, permanent stretch marks will occur.

Normally they appear in the upper lats (on the sides), on the sides of the pectorals and sometimes on biceps.

5] Sudden increase in muscle mass after years of stagnation … or just being a little guy.

If you’ve been going to the same gym for while you get used to the same guys hitting the same machines every day without making any significant gains.

Then all of a sudden they lose all their fat and gain 25 pounds of muscle in 3 months.

On top of that they can train for two hours without getting tired or falling victim to over-training.

Now you know how this happens.

SUMMARY

Five good ways to recognize a steroid user :

Big guts or distended stomach;
Preferential development of the upper body muscles, especially lats;
Gynecomastia or bitch tits;
Stretch marks and/or acne;
Unreasonably fast body transformation.

Bottom line:

I don’t care what people do.

You’re not fooling any of us.

Be man enough to admit it.

Boomers Swapping Sports Cars for ‘Exhilarating Comfort’

http://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2016-10-21/baby-boomers-swap-corvettes-for-comfort-as-sports-car-sales-fall

As an urban dweller of a certain age, I can tell you unequivocally that my demographic [those born between 1946 and 1964] has, in large part, swapped their Porsche sports cars for everything but.

…and the reasons may surprise you.

First, city life, in general, means endless traffic jams [day and night], pot holes, long commutes and texting drivers oblivious to reality as the rest of us know it.

Thus, the probability of being eating alive by the urban terrain isn’t worth it.

And while many guys I know own motorcycles, but they only ride them in groups, usually for charity events.

The rest have migrated to Range Rover, BMW, Mercedes Benz…and the Porsche Macan.

They’re safe, comfortable and powerful.

What’s not to love?

BOTTOM LINE

1] Urbania is a nightmare to navigate. Getting to 60 mph is almost unheard of in most metropolises.

2] SUV’s are well-adapted to lifestyles that don’t involves back and forth to the office routines. Many guys I know use the larger vehicles for the purposes they were intended because they have more leisure time.

3] Safety is a big deal at this stage of life, so why risk serious injury in a fender-bended if you don’t have to?

4] Many guys I know actually like the amenities of larger vehicles, like having cup holders, great sound systems and plush leather seats. And while this may sound a lot like moving away from excitement towards comfort, I might suggest to you that after reading the aforementioned 3 items, this begins to make a lot more sense.

5] We feel like complete idiots driving around in Carrera Turbo’s unless we’re on a racetrack, which we’re not.

PERSONAL NOTE

Not many years ago I owned sports cars. Fast ones. Flashy ones.

And then the whole thing got old.

I felt self-conscious…pretentious, perhaps.

Driving these types of vehicles makes one very, very conscious of other drivers, which becomes exhausting.

Now I drive a Land Rover LR4, and I love it.

Nobody tries to drag me at stoplights, I haven’t received a speeding ticket in years, and I can actually drive up to a restaurant without people staring at me like I’m some sort of sugar daddy wanna-be rock star in terminal adolescence.

Nuf’ said.

Gotta’ Love Mickey Rourke

Baby Boomer, Mickey Rourke, 64, struts his crazy shit in Beverly Hills like nobody’s business.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-3863542/There-s-no-camouflaging-Mickey-Rourke-stands-skintight-trousers-flaunts-brawny-chest-Beverly-Hills.html

…………..

Look at this guy: 64-year-old amalgamation of physical strength and gender-bender audacity.

He’s irony in motion, annihilator of boundaries, the Louis Vitton and Pomeranian standing guard at the castle gates.

After a certain point in life, successful artists just don’t give a crap what you think.

They care about what they think, which inspires the rest of humanity question conformity in general.

So while most guys his age [and level of success] don’t look anything like Mickey Rourke, inside we’re all very similar: Driven, defiant, audacious, struggling to keep the pool of relevance deep and vast against what seems like endless odds.

For this alone you have to give credit where it’s due. Mickey Rourke has taunted fate, living his life inside out in all its glory.

His appearance is emblematic.

Whatever his deepest motives if there are any], the man lives life with a middle finger to the wind, and for that he deserves respect.

Physical Strength and Dexterity the Key To Good Mental Health [in Boomers]

Sylvester Stallone, 70.

Ever read a story along the lines of … “61 year old man knocked to the ground by two teenage girls?”

When you’re in that chronological ballpark, the story becomes more about you than it does what happened to someone in some small town far, far away.

Could I have defended myself in that situation?

Would the teens have even dared approach me, given my physical condition and size?

What would happen if I somehow lost my ability to defend myself in a situation like this?

Would life even be worth living?

Would I have to move to some gated retirement community with 24-hopur armed security to protect me?

As weird as this may sound, the right answers to these questions are at the core of good mental health for men my age.

I have always been very athletic.

To this day I hold the USAPL Texas State record in the Power lift.

I can still run, jump, climb, swim, bike, throw a football…all the things I could do 30 years ago.

But it isn’t 30 years ago. Now I have to warm up, stretch, prepare for battle.

No longer are the days when I went from idle to full bore without missing a beat.

See, no matter what you do to maintain yourself, there’s always a price to pay.

This is why so many older men do stupid shit.

You can fill in the blanks here. I don’t need to reiterate what I’ve said a thousand times before.

In the end, what all older men fear most is Indignity.

Once you understand that, you begin to understand older men.

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